If X is unavailable, then X should not even be a factor to consider here. The real question is about Y. Don't compare Y to X, consider Y on his/her own--- what is it about Y that makes you hesitate, other than that he/she is not X? Not knowing all the details, my instinct says stay with Y, things don't sound bad and you have kids. But I don't know all tbe details.
IIN to stay with the one you need because the one you love isn't available?
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If X is unavailable, then X should not even be a factor to consider here. The real question is about Y. Don't compare Y to X, consider Y on his/her own--- what is it about Y that makes you hesitate, other than that he/she is not X? Not knowing all the details, my instinct says stay with Y, things don't sound bad and you have kids. But I don't know all tbe details.