First off.. This guy Here..FocoUS is a moron. The United States is one of the leading countries providing assistance to families who have babies but can't afford them. They will not TRY to take your baby from you, as a matter of fact unless you prove that you are mentally and physically incapable of taking care of the child they will not even question you keeping it. The SRS - Social Rehabilitation Services are there to HELP families, usually broken ones, but stable ones in bad times aswell. Generally the States have varying degrees of assistance since mainly these programs are run at state levels and not federal. Several Years ago when my friend's wife lost her job they gained food assistance because they couldn't really afford to feed 3 kids and 1 on the way after that moment. There was never once a question raised about the capabilities of that family to take care of the children beyond the financial capacity. Sooooo That worry aside lets talk about the QUESTION!
The Real thing you need to consider in situations like yours is how YOU are going to handle it. There is a difference between wanting a baby, being able to handle a baby, and being PREPARED for a baby. For instance, everything you worry about on a daily basis is amplified by the BABY. Even the thoughts of a BABY on the way multiplies things considerably. Is there enough ROOM for the baby, FOOD for the Baby, MONEY to buy Blankets, Food, Carseat, Stroller, Bed, Basinet, Food(if you go formula instead of breast feeding), and here is the big consideration for baby... TIME. Mearly not having a job doesn't leave you free to have children. You have to make sure that you are prepared to spend your TIME taking care of a Baby, YOUR TIME FEEDING, YOUR TIME Holding, YOUR TIME when you should be SLEEPING, with the baby. Oh and lets not even consider the way your hips are gonna feel the whole time you're pregnant. One of the Most important things to do in this situation is to step back, make a checklist of sacrifices and time considerations and GOALS!
This is important for things like if you or he wants job/better job. If you want to buy a house or go to college, own a nicer car, have children, etc. Put them on a list of priorities and make sure to consider how each one EFFECTS the others. Such as you having a job and getting a car and a house will be better for having a BABY, and going to COLLEGE will be better for ALL of those other things aswell. So make sure that you know that when you skip to the last thing on the list, you greatly decrease your chances for obtaining everything from where you are now to the last item you went to.
It's Important to consider STRESS aswell, You could put too much STRESS on your relationship with a baby at such a young age and drive each other apart. It's a long set of hard choices, but only YOU and HE can make them TOGETHER! If he says NOW, you need to talk about why Now is good, and why now is bad and make sure you make the GOOD decisions, not the ones that feel right in your heart, but the ones that feel right in your HEAD, sometimes they are unfortunately not the same, but in the long run you will have a better life for you, your spouse, and your future bundles of joy.
"The United States is one of the leading countries providing assistance to families who have babies but can't afford them. "
The problem with this is that it doesn't actually fix anything. In the long run if anything it has created generations that continue to remain on welfare and produce... more welfare recipients.
It reminds me of my BF's old apartment complex in CA. The people driving the luxury cars there weren't the ones who were working; they were the ones who were living off of welfare.
I never said it would "fix" anything, but the other poster said that he didn't think the US would give them anything, it was mearly a retort reply to his comment. The rest of my post if you had read it in it's entireity urged the OP to wait and gain stability before trying.
Is it normal to start trying for a baby at 18?
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First off.. This guy Here..FocoUS is a moron. The United States is one of the leading countries providing assistance to families who have babies but can't afford them. They will not TRY to take your baby from you, as a matter of fact unless you prove that you are mentally and physically incapable of taking care of the child they will not even question you keeping it. The SRS - Social Rehabilitation Services are there to HELP families, usually broken ones, but stable ones in bad times aswell. Generally the States have varying degrees of assistance since mainly these programs are run at state levels and not federal. Several Years ago when my friend's wife lost her job they gained food assistance because they couldn't really afford to feed 3 kids and 1 on the way after that moment. There was never once a question raised about the capabilities of that family to take care of the children beyond the financial capacity. Sooooo That worry aside lets talk about the QUESTION!
The Real thing you need to consider in situations like yours is how YOU are going to handle it. There is a difference between wanting a baby, being able to handle a baby, and being PREPARED for a baby. For instance, everything you worry about on a daily basis is amplified by the BABY. Even the thoughts of a BABY on the way multiplies things considerably. Is there enough ROOM for the baby, FOOD for the Baby, MONEY to buy Blankets, Food, Carseat, Stroller, Bed, Basinet, Food(if you go formula instead of breast feeding), and here is the big consideration for baby... TIME. Mearly not having a job doesn't leave you free to have children. You have to make sure that you are prepared to spend your TIME taking care of a Baby, YOUR TIME FEEDING, YOUR TIME Holding, YOUR TIME when you should be SLEEPING, with the baby. Oh and lets not even consider the way your hips are gonna feel the whole time you're pregnant. One of the Most important things to do in this situation is to step back, make a checklist of sacrifices and time considerations and GOALS!
This is important for things like if you or he wants job/better job. If you want to buy a house or go to college, own a nicer car, have children, etc. Put them on a list of priorities and make sure to consider how each one EFFECTS the others. Such as you having a job and getting a car and a house will be better for having a BABY, and going to COLLEGE will be better for ALL of those other things aswell. So make sure that you know that when you skip to the last thing on the list, you greatly decrease your chances for obtaining everything from where you are now to the last item you went to.
It's Important to consider STRESS aswell, You could put too much STRESS on your relationship with a baby at such a young age and drive each other apart. It's a long set of hard choices, but only YOU and HE can make them TOGETHER! If he says NOW, you need to talk about why Now is good, and why now is bad and make sure you make the GOOD decisions, not the ones that feel right in your heart, but the ones that feel right in your HEAD, sometimes they are unfortunately not the same, but in the long run you will have a better life for you, your spouse, and your future bundles of joy.
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Angel_in_a_Glass_Dress
11 years ago
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"The United States is one of the leading countries providing assistance to families who have babies but can't afford them. "
The problem with this is that it doesn't actually fix anything. In the long run if anything it has created generations that continue to remain on welfare and produce... more welfare recipients.
It reminds me of my BF's old apartment complex in CA. The people driving the luxury cars there weren't the ones who were working; they were the ones who were living off of welfare.
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Maid_in_Pink
11 years ago
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I never said it would "fix" anything, but the other poster said that he didn't think the US would give them anything, it was mearly a retort reply to his comment. The rest of my post if you had read it in it's entireity urged the OP to wait and gain stability before trying.
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Angel_in_a_Glass_Dress
11 years ago
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indeed they should.
however I suspect the OP doesn't actually care if she's doing nothing but producing more mouths to suck off the welfare teats