Yes, I've heard the same thing. I don't always appreciate the way people here in the states feel comfortable asking me twenty questions right off the bat as soon as they meet me. I think most people are just being friendly, but it comes off kinda like an interrogation, and it's hard to tell if someone has nefarious intentions right from the beginning. Then again if I feel uncomfortable it's a good reason to just excuse myself. I've usually been quite friendly for most of my life so I have ended up over sharing with people, and then walked away feeling kinda emotionally violated.
I'd like to be comfortable saying something like, "hey, let's leave the Spanish Inquisition in the history books, okay", especially if it's some creepy, overenthusiastic guy, but women can be like that too. I love having a cellphone because I don't have to feel lonely, or needy, and it's an easy way to make myself unavailable. Of course I used to just carry a book, or magazine with me a lot back in the day.
One thing that has helped me immensely has been CoDA, also known as Codependents Anonymous, the list known as the Patterns and Characteristics of Codependence is a great tool!
IIN to respond honestly to the question "What do you do?"
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In some cultures its considered rude to ask that right away.
You could give a snarky answer like " as little as possible" or " i do my best"
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RoseIsabella
2 years ago
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Yes, I've heard the same thing. I don't always appreciate the way people here in the states feel comfortable asking me twenty questions right off the bat as soon as they meet me. I think most people are just being friendly, but it comes off kinda like an interrogation, and it's hard to tell if someone has nefarious intentions right from the beginning. Then again if I feel uncomfortable it's a good reason to just excuse myself. I've usually been quite friendly for most of my life so I have ended up over sharing with people, and then walked away feeling kinda emotionally violated.
I'd like to be comfortable saying something like, "hey, let's leave the Spanish Inquisition in the history books, okay", especially if it's some creepy, overenthusiastic guy, but women can be like that too. I love having a cellphone because I don't have to feel lonely, or needy, and it's an easy way to make myself unavailable. Of course I used to just carry a book, or magazine with me a lot back in the day.
One thing that has helped me immensely has been CoDA, also known as Codependents Anonymous, the list known as the Patterns and Characteristics of Codependence is a great tool!
https://coda.org/meeting-materials/patterns-and-characteristics-2011/