Is it normal to not show any emotion, nor experience empathy?

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I am a 23 year old college student. I have a wife, two cats, a house, nice car, nice things, good job, etc. etc. etc. However,for as long as I can remember I have not been able to experience emotional responses to things that I should. I also experience sudden bursts of emotional responses at times where it doesn't warrant such a strong response. Like in a movie with a scene that I find applicable to my life, past or present. When this happens, it is a crushing flood of emotions that goes away as quickly as it arrives. Like a balloon inflating and then bursting. My father died when I was 8, i was molested as a child, my mother remarried several times, once to an extremely abusive man. I moved out at 17 and have made it a point to do everything on my own. I love my wife I think, but the emotions are so random who knows. When she is sad I can't comfort her and I am heartless in my decisions about things. I see everything in black/white with complete detachment from the situation. I have little to no friends, but I have had several over the course of my life. They are brief friendships and then I seem to shut them out and disappear out of their lives. I have done this at least 5-6 times since graduating high-school to 5-6 different groups of people. Oddly though, I think it's normal and am not bothered by not having friends in my phone. I struggled with deciding whether I was homosexual starting at 17. Most of the time the thought of gay sexual activity does not arouse me and now I believe I am heterosexual but if I was aroused/horny I would be with a dude easily. My standards for the guys I would be with are extremely high, while for girls my standards aren't so high. I have had sexual experiences with guys/girls. I have been faithful to my wife since we were wed in May of 2010. I can lie, very well. I have perfected manipulation and do it better than anyone I know due to my utter detachment. I know this is extremely convoluted and hard to follow, but if I stop typing I will close the page without submitting it. Please help, I want to be normal...

Is It Normal?
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  • Review
    11 years ago | pl

    You're a sociopath, but not a true one, because a true one would never be able to admit any of those things.

    There is nothing you can do about it. Some people say we are the new alpha type predator and our numbers are increasing. Who knows though.

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  • purpleflower
    11 years ago | pl

    There are definite traces of sociopathic tendencies but that doesn't necessarily mean that you are one. You are not alone in how you feel and see the world. If you really don't like it, you could try going to therapy, with the history that you have of horrible childhood experiences it is likely that is the cause of your odd emotional behaviour. Also, if you feel that passionate about changing, your emotional state is most likely not permanent. Change would be nearly impossible if you didn't have any emotions at all.

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