Is it normal to not like people?

79% Normal
6 Comments

I dont like people. I look around me, look at the horrible and despicable things people do to each other - on the political level but also on the societal and personal - and i have just developed this disdain for them. I dont trust them. It manifests by me having a really low BS tolerance and always being on guard and in a defensive mode when it comes to others.

After seeing first hand how people treat each other, I am just always on defensive mode, as I think they just want to f&^ck me over. I am 32 now and over the years I have come to the conclusion that people are self serving. Yes sure there are nice folks every now and then but most people really are only so when it is convenient. Most of my so-called friends, for example, are fair weather friends. They only wanna be around me if I am in a happy jolly state of mind and dont talk about any issues or problems (personal or political). The moment something happens and i feel like i can no longer just be a happy idiot and put THEM in a good mood, they sort of ignore me or diss me. And it's not just on the friends level, I am constantly in arguing mode with the world. If I dont pay attention, my bank screws me over, or the cashier at the grocery store charges me the full price for a sale item. Or a company charges me shipping even though it says free shipping. What I am trying to say is that I feel like I am constantly on guard defending myself against the injustices and dishonesties of people in the world and it gets exhausting. I feel if i am not on guard and defend myself, people, banks, institutions will just take advantage of me.

I guess that's why I dont like people. I think they are mostly selfish, callous, petty creatures who wouldnt mind stepping all over you if it served them - even those who call you friends. I must admit i have been let down by a lot of people I trusted and loved - and i mean let down hard.

My disdain for people is why a) I am alone or lonely and b) also why I never can feel happy for anyone, even "friends" and always am in "hate" and "defense" mode.

The problem is: I dont know how to change that. How do I get to like ppl? It is very personal. I cannot just pretend these issues I have with them are not real and trust them. When close friends, people you love(d) and trust(ed) screw you over like that, what hope is there for the rest of human kind as such?

Voting Results
79% Normal
Based on 68 votes (54 yes)
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Comments ( 6 )
  • Thatguy777
    13 years ago

    It's normal. Most people are selfish fucks who diss everyone for amusement.

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  • [Old Memory]
    13 years ago

    same dude same.

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  • petrichor
    13 years ago

    Maybe you could be one of those people who paint themselves silver and stand in cities with their hat on the floor? They don't have to talk to or even like anyone but have come up with a way of making a living.

    Do you own any silver paint?

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  • andyzx1
    13 years ago

    aww

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  • Hard_Candy
    13 years ago

    I agree totally with OP and feel the same about people. I have very few "real friends". Most people are shit and most people and businesses will try to screw you. When a mistake is made its never in your favor and yes you do constantly have to be on guard. I disagree with comments that say just go out there and trust, if you get hurt, so what... No. If you go around trusting everyone you'll end up getting taken advantage of and getting your heart repeatedly broken. Fuck that. I have learned from my mistakes in blindly trusting people. Now, people have to earn my trust and even then I always keep my guard up somewhat.

    Ultimately though there is a balance because you cannot just isolate yourself from the world. You must interact with people and try to find a decent partner who exhibits solid, fundamental characteristics. Don't give up. My thing is that I let people in, but not too much. You let them get close, but don't give them everything. Save something for yourself. I always expect the worst from people, but hope for the best. I hope to meet a terrific partner in 2011 (eventhough there are many, many losers out there). But I keep hope alive, hope is the key. I consider myself a cynical optimist really.

    Great quote I found "Life is the definition of imperfection." Life is both suffering and magnificent beauty, it's up to you to make the most of it.

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  • mudbleach
    13 years ago

    sure most people are Aholes, but it seems like you mostly have a problem geting ripped off, people dont watch there finances anymore and get ripped off all the time, and half the time its the person doing it has done job the job so many times things slip in the cracks it just happens.

    ..as for faithweatherd friends you have to find like minded people iv cast off dosens of friends over the years for more like minded ones eventualy you get a nice solid group of friends that you can just be honest with and say stuff like "if X happens i get bitchy i dont mean to blablabla" or whatever and true friends will know that and not care. and once you have a few good true friends who cares about the rest of the self serving douchbags? you take care of you and yours dont get ripped of watch your fiances dont let the bank rape you and your good to go! lol.

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