I'm sorry that happened to you. I think you should see a therapist. Find a good one you click with and don't settle for someone who might not be a good fit for you. They will guide you into what to talk about. It's okay if you cry. I've had panic attacks with a therapist just asking me how I'm doing. For me a therapist is the only person I can really talk to about my problems and them understand me. When I bring things up that are bothering me to people I know they just don't understand. They're caring, but they don't understand.
IIN to not have talked to anyone about a traumatic experience? (long)
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I'm sorry that happened to you. I think you should see a therapist. Find a good one you click with and don't settle for someone who might not be a good fit for you. They will guide you into what to talk about. It's okay if you cry. I've had panic attacks with a therapist just asking me how I'm doing. For me a therapist is the only person I can really talk to about my problems and them understand me. When I bring things up that are bothering me to people I know they just don't understand. They're caring, but they don't understand.