I don't think there is a universal law of cheating: it strictly depends on what you and your partner have established is exclusive behavior between you two. For some couples cuddling with a friend is cheating, for others is kisses and sex, for others is sharing your intimate secrets with someone other than your partner, and for some sex and making out is not cheating as long as it's just booty calls with no deeper feelings involved; for others is only cheating if you keep it a secret. It is not a straight line. You should probably discuss about it with your partner to find out what cheating is for you.
Is it normal to not be sure what cheating is?
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I don't think there is a universal law of cheating: it strictly depends on what you and your partner have established is exclusive behavior between you two. For some couples cuddling with a friend is cheating, for others is kisses and sex, for others is sharing your intimate secrets with someone other than your partner, and for some sex and making out is not cheating as long as it's just booty calls with no deeper feelings involved; for others is only cheating if you keep it a secret. It is not a straight line. You should probably discuss about it with your partner to find out what cheating is for you.