Is it normal to have a super dominant relationship

My good friend is dating this girl, has been for over a year. Their relationship is super one sided, as he totally dominates her. He doesn't lie to her or physically abuse her, but in a nutshell he calls all the shots, and is open about the fact that he is going to sleep with whatever other girls he wants to, as this is what she agreed to initially and continues to do so. On the other hand, she is hopelessly devoted to him and he essentially doesn't even allow her to give out her number to other guys, or make any new male friends. He has a very strict set of rules with her, and whenever she mildly infringes upon them he tells her she fucked up and she starts crying hysterically and struggles to breathe. Suffice it to say, that she is generally very loyal and usually adheres to his boundaries.

Anyhow, she recently had to do a group project with a guy in one of her classes. She said he's presumably gay or bi, and gave him her number, as he is OK with her having gay friends. After the project, she informed my friend that she was inviting the guy to a party we were throwing.

His concern was that she did not know whether he was gay or not, and did not want her to start playing the gay card to rack up male friends who may be straight and intend to hook up with her. So for the past week he has been telling her that he can't be her boyfriend, only her fuck friend since she couldn't follow the simple rules. She has been hysterically crying a lot and generally having a very rough time over the "demotion" (although it doesn't actually change anything).

So, I know the basic setup of the relationship is not very normal...but is it normal that my friend cares about this to the point where he has been pro-active in handling the situation?

Is It Normal?
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Comments ( 11 ) Sort: best | oldest
  • sounds like the dude needs a good shot to the balls and she needs to get some self respect and demand better. she needs to get the hell away from him and possibly into a support group or some kind of therapy. as for captain douche bag he needs to get his ass beat and contract some nasty std that he will carry for the rest of his life for being such a psychotic freak.

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  • fair play to the guy i respect him, i wish i could get a girl who would be completey submissive to me as long as he doesnt hit her and allows her to leave him its normal

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    • me too, except if I could get that level of commitment I wouldn't go cheating on her. What a dick.

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  • This is disgusting

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  • This guy is a pig. He sounds more like a lunatic father than a devoting boyfriend. She needs to leave him, or he needs to start showing respect and stop being a hypocrite. If he's allowed to see other women, what's wrong with her seeing or talking to other men?

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  • If she's happy with it. You can find at least one thing about any couple that's not "normal", but if she doesn't like it let he'd grow a pair and do something about it.

    That other part about him maybe being gay, I didn't get it.

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  • FYI the guy might be fucked up but the girl isn't stupid. She's the 10th or 11th girl to be in a relationship of a year or more with him (many of them ran concurrently) and all of the relationships were the same. She was a virgin before she started dating him is really a sweet girl, she just fell under his magic power that he seems to have over women. It's almost like a drug addiction, but without any warnings from DARE.

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  • K well that guy is fucked up and that girl is stupid. He should stop trying to control her and she shouldn't even talk to him anymore.

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  • He just wants control over her. And when he sees himself losing control he flips out. It's a power thing

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  • ^^agreed
    This whole thing is fcked up. He can sex whoever but is she even looks at another guy he makes her feel like a worthless bitch. Why does she even care about this asshole. U r asking the wrong question here...

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  • No the guy sounds like an asshole! And seriously messed up. Who would do that to someone. But something is also seriously wrong with the girl he is with or isn't with. Whatever the case maybe.

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