Is it normal to have a low libido when your infant shares your room?

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My husband and I live in a small two bedroom apartment with the other bedroom belonging to our 6 year-old daughter. 3 months ago our son was born and now shares our bedroom with us. I'm finding it hard to be turned on with our infant sleeping less than 5 feet away from our bed. During the day I feel to exhausted as I'm up part of the night to nurse and take care of the baby. My husband has told me how frustrating it is for him and that he baby is asleep and does not understand what we would be doing. He's told me to get over it. Is what I am feeling normal?

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  • Sally_Sally
    7 years ago | pl

    Yes, this is totally normal, but there's more to it than that. After childbirth, your normal sex drive is naturally less and could remain that way for as long as a year, especially if you're still breast feeding. So, it's completely normal. There's nothing abnormal about it.

    Talk to your doctor to get details, and then after you do, go to your husband and explain to him about the hormone recoup your body is going through. You'll have to be understanding to him, and help him with his needs, too. Grin and bear it if you have to. Masturbate him, or give him oral sex. Remember, men get erections and think about sex 20 to 50 times a day.

    You have to think about this logically. Your body has gone through some changes. The fact that your baby is in the room with you really isn't driving this - many parents keep their baby in the room with them because they are doting parents and want the new baby close. That's normal and expected.

    Your body will take some time to adjust and your hormone levels to return to pre-maternity levels.

    Again, talk to your OB. They know about this, it's common. Just tell him/her your intimate life with your husband isn't returning and your drive isn't what it was, then listen to what he/she says. It'll be okay. It will return and you'll be the sex pot you used to be, believe me. You can't rush this, though.

    Men don't experience the changes we do during and after childbirth, so don't expect your husband to figure it out on his own. He's expecting you to get wet and randy and doesn't understand why that's not happening.

    Take care of him in a way that pleases him. Put the baby in a cradle or rocker in another room after feeding and pull your husband into your bedroom and ask him what you could do to make him happy, then try your best to make it happen for him. Whatever he wants, you smile and turn on your charm. You get the picture?

    This is real life. It'll be fine. It's normal.

    Hope this helps.

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  • Sokalgirl
    7 years ago | pl

    Alot of people feel that way. Dont feel weird . ive had 2 children in the past year they are 10 month apart. I obviously didnt have this problem up until after i had my daughter but its because my son is almost 1 now and dont want him to watch .

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  • thegypsysailor
    7 years ago | pl

    Ya think?

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