Is it normal to have a family like this...

I'm 19 and I've been thinking about my life with my family. My dad is EXTREMELY loud, talkative, know it all, controlling. My mom is kind of bland, never finishes her sentences, can be pushed over by my dad and sister, and likes to control me (just me). My older sister is very aggressive, confrontational, talkative, and always thinks she is right.

I am extremely quiet (almost never talk), non confrontational nor argumentative, I listen very well, I try to help and be nice when possible.

When I was a baby my sister who is 2 years older, would come over to me and push me down. she was ALWAYS hogging the spotlight when it came to our parents. My parents seemed to talk and interact with her more than they did with me. she was aggressive enough that my mom wouldnt want to stop her and my dad LOVED her way too much to say anything.

Today, my mom is always being pushed over by my sister no matter what. sometimes my sister calls my mom names or makes her look stupid. things my mom normally wouldnt let me do are totally fine when it comes to my sister. it drives me crazy. my mom goes along with her and smiles and acts like her best friend who is below her or something. When they are together its like they dont act the same and try to get me to do shit for them like some pack of bitchy girls.

My dad adores my sister more than anything in this world. he uses a baby voice when she is around (she's turning 22) and you can just tell by the look on his face when she's around that he is super happy. he never is like that with me. at dinner when its just me and him, sometimes he wont even say anything.

I think the disconnection between my parents and myself is from lack of success in my life. also, i have been caught drinking and smoking ganj in the house a few years ago. i feel like since i am going to community college and my sister is about to graduate from NYU, my parents treat her with much more respect and give her permission to do whatever really.

When i ask why i do not have the same liberties, my mom usually will say, "Once you ... (achieve whatever my sister has acheieved at the moment) then you can do it." Which is fucking stupid, because we are not the same person.

My parents and sister talk amongst each other a lot and i know sometimes it is about me and me failing.

I feel very disconnected and unappreciated by my family and feel like my lack of success in my own life is because of a lack of support from my family, anything in my life is overshadowed by my sister's glorious achievements, also i feel that my parents let me be on my own (alone) way too much. i remember spending most of my time in my room when i was younger and now it is rediculous how much time i spend alone. I have gotten so used to being a lone that i usually only come down for dinner, eat quickly then just go back up because i know my fam doesnt have anything really to say to me. sometimes i feel like a disgrace