Is it normal to hate your mother?

My mom did the same thing when I was younger. My brother or I would do some thing to empress her (normally my brother) and they'd be the favoret until the other does some thing more empressive or the favoret f*** up. This went on until high school when she got a dog. So soon after she got the thing she admitted to playing favorets to make us do better.

Fast forward to now, and the dog is her favoret, a rift has grown between my brother and I, and we both have emotion issuses.

You're not a bad daughter. Mom's are just messed up.

I am 52 years old, and I can't honestly remember when I last experienced genuine feelings of affection for Mother. Probably I once did have such feelings, in the uncritical way of small toddlers, but throughout later life I've scarcely been able to regard her as anything other than an insufferable irritant. The greatest problem I have, while discussing her, is in trying to keep a check on my emotions and not descending into downright obscene insult. Almost every day, alone and in private, I do in fact subject her to a prolonged orgy of verbal abuse. Frequently my hatred and resent bubbles up in public - I will find myself attracting odd looks on a bus, for example, by furiously muttering to myself or writhing about in my seat, internally raging at her very existence. I fantasise about hurling the most hatefully wounding accusations and judgements at her, and dwell morosely on the most poisonous criticism she ever made of me: "You're just like your father; you're just like your father!" Such vengeful reveries generally climax with me screaming these very words insanely in her ear, so she just keels over and dies from the sudden shock of it. Ah, the most wonderfully poetic kind of justice!

I am also a teen and have realized my mother is often very wrong about what she does. My therapist has discovered that she tends to act like a teen which relates to a previous poster who wrote that parents frequently "forgot they are parents." I try to speak to her but she yells, and even goes as far as to call me a slut and tells me she hates me. She apologizes after our argument and says she loves me but, I am beginning to be unable to forgive her. After so many times, it is difficult to forgive someone when you know they are going to just repeat the action. Lately I have felt emotionless towards her. she is coming home from a vacation, and I have cried many times because I don't want her to come home. She brings stress to my life, and treats me horribly. I don't even speak when she yells at me and goes on her frequent rampages. To your question, I don't think you are a bad daughter and can completely relate. Though I wish I could have feelings towards my mother, after years of abuse, my feelings towards her have grown less and less. Is that normal?

Jen is right IMO. You are definitely OK - no problemo - but your relationship with your Mom is - well frankly - in the toilet.

Mend fences. Your Mom is going to need an older, mature, been there done that, daughter whom she can rely on when the sibs get to their difficult-to-be-with time. you're it. make the most ad be a friend to your Mom.

Having a bad relationship with your mom is probably not the norm, but how you are feeling about it is normal, don't worry.

I think a lot of parents forget that THEY are the parent and they are suppose to be there for their child and not the other way around. It's the parents responsibility to maintain a good relationship with their child. Unfortunately, some parents think it's all about them and how they are feeling; believing that it's their child that is the sole problem, when in all reality, it is them that is the failure.

If you want to have a better relationship with your selfish mother, then you will have to be the one who makes the first move. If you don't care about your relationship with her, you can always cut your ties with her and the rest of your family and move on. I think you DO want a relationship with her, otherwise you wouldn't have asked if it's normal and what you can do about it.

In that case, I think you should let her know, in a non-hostile manner, how you feel. Keep the conversation blame-free and only about feelings. If she starts pointing the finger of blame at you, don't let that get you worked up - stay calm. Hear what she has to say and ask her what you could do to make her feel happier with you. If she's open to it, be specific about what you need from her to feel good about your relationship. Never talk about it when you are in the middle of a fight.

I may be wrong, but this is just a suggestion. Maybe your mother favors your siblings because you are so indifferent towards her? You're not necessarily a bad daughter, but try being a better daughter for a while. Have some bonding time with her, and see if that changes things. Mothers are a good thing to have, and you shouldn't go your whole life alienating yours.