Is it normal to hate seeing beauty in somrthing?

For my whole life, I've lived in Washington. But I hate in here! I want to leave and find a fresh start, somewhere far away where I can forget my disfunctional family and be who I want to be, not what every one else expects me to be. I'm only fifteen, so I know that most people are going to think that it's just me being hormonal and immature, but I truley am unhappy here. My house feels like a prison, one where I can be free from only for the limited school hours and then I have to willingly go back into captivity. It always rains here, it never stops, and I want something MORE. More than just rain and clouds and grey. But I hate myself for loving it, too. When the rain falls, thundering against the roof and the windows, blowing sideways in the trees and making them bend and sway under the force of unrelenting air. And the way the clouds look when the sun hits them after a storm... It's beautiful, and I can't help but hate myself for knowing that I have to leave. When I see my future staying here, I see nothing- I need to leave to find myself, and I can't help but feel selfish and greedy for wanting more. I have the tears of angels falling around me every day, blowing kisses and then smiling on the clouds to give comfort. I feel myself breaking every day, and yet I have everything to keep me whole. Who am I, to want more?