Is it normal to get sexually* aroused by rc car and plane?
Short text version:
I got sexually aroused by RC car and plane ( only the miniaturized version, the full-size car and plane don't give me the same effect
That thing I think very out of the norm, but can't be so sure about it since I can't talk about that to anyone (I really want to talk about that plus some of the other issues with a psychiatrist but I really afraid that they'd laugh on me for having such silly thought)
I genuinely think that those things come at me for the compensation of my childhood without any significant fantasies
Long Text Detail
The following details are very long, it gonna take about 5 minutes to read. But I'd really appreciate if you read it since I haven't shared this things with anybody.
##About the No. 1 part##
I categorized them in evolution steps to help you read the following texts
**Evolution 0
At first, there is no sign of such thing, I’m just heavily fascinated with RC car, I mean everybody has their hobbies, right?
For detail most of the time I imagine then racing on certain routes that turned into a circuit.
**Evolution 0.5**
With almost everyday imagination, that thing slowly evolves as I found better changes in things to imagine to keep it interesting. The first step is of evolution is the car is controlled from quite far away and the owner can see via FPV camera mounted on the car. The previously mentioned changes reveal one of my bad behavior because the people who're controlling is no longer really on my sign, I started to attribute identity of each RC car to its own and disassociate them with their respective owner, because the owner also quite far I usually find myself recovering cars that got stuck in mid-race, and that gives me slight arousement as they looks so helpless, next bad thing is sometimes I delay dropping the rear wheel of the car at the start to some participants to annoy them (suffice to say it makes me feels so powerful).
**Evolution 1.0**
The next evolution comes with changes, now car owners not allowed to go to the track by themselves, they have to drive their RC to the track. Also, all participant now control their RC via fixed car cockpit replica with a big screen at the windshield, and a small screen on the rearview mirror, the car now also more powerful, advanced with more diagnostic information to be sent to the racer, and additional rear camera for rear-facing view. At this point my mischief behavior toned down, even though now the identity disassociation is much stronger since all cars anonymized and I can’t see the driver, I just enjoy imagining them doing cool stunt like drifts and abrasive pole position fight (sometimes cars got out of track because one of the racers did pit maneuver to eliminate the competition ahead).
**Evolution 2.0**
Next evolution removed the actual human that controlling the cars, now I imagined the car have advanced onboard computer and sensors to control themselves plus some human-like behavior. I feel more powerful since now they depend on me to plug in their battery charger every night, at this point, they are smart enough to have a chit-chat with me.
**Evolution 2.5**
The next changes come, and it’s a bit rollback with some small differences. I imagined myself being an important target and everywhere I got there is probably an RC car controlled by spy agent from halfway around the world always follows me when I’m outside, at that phase I occasionally actually look to my back when I'm walking alone.
**Evolution 3.0A**
The next phase is air vehicles, this phase is very slow, and evolves much slower than an RC car, probably because I had to totally make up the scenarios from the sketch in my mind. Air vehicle, more specifically fixed-wing aircraft is more interesting to me because air vehicle generally require more help, like they aren’t really suited to fly inside a room, and need to me carried them around to be brought to road on front of my house so they can take off, and when they back I need to bring them inside, wash, and charge them.
**Evolution 4.0A**
The next evolution of aircraft brings some abilities to be more independent since now the aircraft is smaller and they have VTOL capability (because they modeled after Navy F35B. Also now those mini jets (they are around 10 cm long, and less than a kilogram weigh) can be my guard. When I’m outside I’ll let them fly high scanning the surrounding, and when I’m going inside a room, I’ll call them back and land on my palm to be put inside my pocket. The way they be my guard is by becoming a suicidal* plane.
**Evolution 4.0A & 4.1A**
There are 2 versions of how those personal guardians protect me, on the first version they’ll just fly high then to gain potential energy, then accelerate down toward to person who’s attacking me and using the kinetic energy to slam its hardened nose to pierce the attackers skull, it’s not really a suicide since I expect a solid-state memory can survive in such condition. On the second approach, I actually replaced the hardened nose with a shaped explosive charge, that effectively eliminates needs to fly high first to gain energy, since now the plane can just fly straight toward the head and at certain distance explode their shaped explosive.
**Evolution 5.0A (Last state, and no longer changed for around 3 years)
The last iteration of my aircraft brought the idea back to the more practical side. I enlarged the plane so it’s around 90 cm length, and few kilograms weigh, that size enlargement allows for the better neural engine to be put on board, as well as extending its flight duration, with such big size, now I carry him like I’m carrying a laptop. At this stage it now has 2 power plant loadout, it can have 2 jets for pure performance at reduced endurance or 2 propellers powered by one turbine engine for better endurance at cost of top speed. It now uses the model of Vercolac aircraft in Ace Combat series with a slight alteration of engine placement to allow VTOL. At this point he’s no longer my guarding, rather more a personal buddy of mine ( maybe if needed he can be integrated with previous-gen of the plane ).
And that’s the summary of my imagination about some miniaturized vehicle equipped with human-like AI this last 11 years, there’s a lot of details I’d like to share but it would make this comment too long be comfortably read(which is already it is). There’s also next thing I’d like to ask “is it normal”, but I've to break it down into 2 separate post since it's longer than 7,000 characters length if combined with this text.