Is it normal to feel that i won't be alive much longer?

Please get help.

You don't have a dog do you? They are known as man's best friend for a reason as they love you unconditionally. Stroking a pet also reduces your stress levels and maybe taking it for long walks will help you get some fresh air. Even being out of the house will stop you over-eating and you can talk to it without the fear of it laughing at you or telling your secrets!

If you don't want one, why not offer to walk one for the neighbours. Honestly, they really help!

I don't think I'll live that long ether...
Im always scared to share my feelings, which is one of the reasons I signed up.
I have friends and only a fraction of them do I deep feelings with.
I purged allot of feelings to one of them, but I stopped because I was scared that she might get depressed.
Maybe you should see a therapist, but don't see one that tries to push pills on you. My doctor is the same way and I don't trust him, so I always end up lying to him. Or, find something relaxing to do like: art, walking, meditating,etc. Good Luck:)

Looks like a depression. Regime, walks, society, may be church.

I cant understand suicidal people/people who have given up.

There are many ways to seek help, like going to a psychiatrist, joining a social group like a football team or a theater group.

First of all you have to realize that even if you are as down as you are right now, there isn't a person in the world who can make you take the step outdoors. You have to lift your ass from your own personal space and take a walk outside in the world. People can help you, but they can't carry you or force you.

You say that you masterbate a lot, and you are/starting to get overweight(?). There too, it's only you it comes down to. If you get to a psychiatrist, if you join a social group or if you get yourself a dog like mentioned above, you have officialy taken the first step.

I've been exactly where you are, and i'll tell you, i'm definetly not the most handsome guy in the crowd, but i've had 2 healthy and beautiful relationships with girls way over my league.

you won't get anything unless you really want it, and do something about it. Check out law of attraction on google. It doesn't have to be true, but if it motivates someone who cares?

The mental health association here, in my neck of the woods, can be really helpful.

Thats amazing! Because my neighbors dog usually barks his butt at me but today he was very playful.. So I kinda made funny faces at him. It did feel good and i like dog but right now I'm really in need of human contact. I've passed the point, I believe where I can help myself.

im so sorry for your pain, but please don't give up :(

Whatever you do, please don't commit suicide; it's just not worth it. Try not to take everything so seriously, find something to take your mind off your problems and just be optimistic in general; of course nobody can guarantee that things will defeinitely change for the better, but hope dies last, as they say.
Also, never stop looking for a way to escape out of your private trap; when it shows up, go for it without hesitation.

Hey bud

I have derealization & anxiety

But I'm not planing to live any longer

Were both the same ! ;}