Is it normal to feel disconnected from my body?

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I am a female and I was abused physically and emotionally by both of my parents until I was 17. My father would belt myself and my sister violently and she would pass out and he would belt her awake and part of my punishment other than the belting was watching her punishment. I was often backhanded to the ground and was beat for masturbation at an early age. He also did "body" inspections which were embarassing. My mother made up things to tell my father to anger him to beat me (both of them admitted to dog the beating for pleasure) but I don't think it was sexually motivated.

Now, as I am an adult, I have noticed that I am disconnected from my body in a way. My husband will pet me or have me lean his head on my shoulder or vice versa and I will not notice until I think about what I am doing. Its been that way my whole life, I being Mon reactant to physical stimulation inflicted on me by others. I do not reciprocate to affection naturally.

Is it normal to me to feel disconnected, physically, from my body? Is it because I was abused (which I suspect)?

Is It Normal?
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  • Dulse.
    11 years ago | pl

    I think it might be because you where abused. I hope you are doing okay now. Some people become disconnected from their body, or their world for a large number of reasons. I've heard this feeling is usually called depersonalization, or derealization.

    I imagine it can be reversed or helped to a large extent eventually, and I wish you good luck.

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  • TheKandyMan
    6 years ago | pl

    The experiences you had to face most likely put you in a state that any sort of physical confrontation was a negative thing, and your body has learned to sort of mask it out. Until you make that connection of what's actually going on, your body will try to prevent it.

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