is it normal to envy women?

Fair enough.
To offer advice than, if you want to dress as a woman but are not interested in living it full time, there is that option.

We used to all that "cross dressing". Of course today there are a bunch of stupid labels that us transgender aren't even sure what the hell they mean but anyways -
You could always dress up on weekends or when time allows.

This much will allow you to at least enjoy the presentation part.