It can be hard to see which way the stigmatization is going in cases like these. Like for one, not saying this is you, but having a fetish can be considered freakish. I remember this video of a blind girl, made this whole video about respecting blindness and being open, and then was like, oh yeah, I don't want people on tinder to know I'm blind before they swipe so I can weed out these creepy fetish guys.
Like you gotta see them as people first.
And then the second part is it really sounds like a stigmatization of being intersex. Like if a dude goes crazy over big butts or a girl over a dick or if a guy is hispanic that's cool, but if the hots are for someone intersex now it's a perverted fetish? That really to me just sounds like its based in a judgement of being intersex. That for some reason it shouldn't be sexy and that's how you get to "people who get turned on by it are freaks"
That all being said I understand what you're saying. Just being wanted for your body sucks, but that really isn't a specifically intersex thing. People with fetishes are people too. Some are gonna be jerks and some decent people. A fetish just means what you like isn't seen as mainstream, despite in some cases actually being very popular. It doesn't mean that you're more likely to 'fetishize' or not care about the person who possesses the feature that turns you on.
I'm sorry if this was the case with your girlfriend from the past. I hope you find somebody who loves you and is attracted to you!! And can be comfortable and confident with them being attracted to you.
Sorry if this sounds like I really don't get it. Speaking only from POV of a person with a fetish, not as someone who's intersex. Just my general belief that when 2 people spend enough time, you can find out if there's a connection there or not, and just be people.
I would try to have an open mind, you might get people who are drawn in by you being intersex, then find that's like the least interesting thing about you.
Is it normal to embrace being fetishized? Intersex.
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It can be hard to see which way the stigmatization is going in cases like these. Like for one, not saying this is you, but having a fetish can be considered freakish. I remember this video of a blind girl, made this whole video about respecting blindness and being open, and then was like, oh yeah, I don't want people on tinder to know I'm blind before they swipe so I can weed out these creepy fetish guys.
Like you gotta see them as people first.
And then the second part is it really sounds like a stigmatization of being intersex. Like if a dude goes crazy over big butts or a girl over a dick or if a guy is hispanic that's cool, but if the hots are for someone intersex now it's a perverted fetish? That really to me just sounds like its based in a judgement of being intersex. That for some reason it shouldn't be sexy and that's how you get to "people who get turned on by it are freaks"
That all being said I understand what you're saying. Just being wanted for your body sucks, but that really isn't a specifically intersex thing. People with fetishes are people too. Some are gonna be jerks and some decent people. A fetish just means what you like isn't seen as mainstream, despite in some cases actually being very popular. It doesn't mean that you're more likely to 'fetishize' or not care about the person who possesses the feature that turns you on.
I'm sorry if this was the case with your girlfriend from the past. I hope you find somebody who loves you and is attracted to you!! And can be comfortable and confident with them being attracted to you.
Sorry if this sounds like I really don't get it. Speaking only from POV of a person with a fetish, not as someone who's intersex. Just my general belief that when 2 people spend enough time, you can find out if there's a connection there or not, and just be people.
I would try to have an open mind, you might get people who are drawn in by you being intersex, then find that's like the least interesting thing about you.