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Lately i have been thinking of cutting my finger with a sharp, serrated knife. I have cut myself at work before, albeit rarely (I work in a kitchen).I never really notice the cut, its more of a reflex that jerks my hand away, then I notice the blood. Anyway, i keep thinking of cutting my finger, and how it would hurt, and i am kind of afraid of the knives now. Why do i keep obsessing about it, even though i rarely ever cut myself ?
When I'm around knives or anything sharp, I often get the urge to slash my wrists. Even though I've never Used to cut my wrists. I always fight it, though. I guess this is why I try to avoid using sharp knives:/ it's normal to get the urge, but try not to act on it.
thanks everybody! I think space_ghost? is probably the closest to this one, i really appreciate the honest answers. I was worrying that i was getting depressed (im really usually happy!) and so now i realize i was just being over careful. Just paying too much attention to what MIGHT happen, but not IS happening. SO thanks to all of you you have provided much insight.
Personally, whenever I see a knife, I have a hankering to swing it around (carefully) and analyze its potential as a weapon, as if it were an item in some sort of adventure game.
The only time I got those specific thoughts were back when I was suffering with depression.