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As a short guy 5'6, I have been rejected and told I'm too short by many women. Other than my height, I'm nice looking in shape, have a good job and personality. Short girls dont want to be with a short guy, tall girls say they feel awkward with me.
I find a hypocrisy with it tbh. I'm gay so this doesn't really affect me, but I do stand on the outside making my little observations...
I genuinely don't think many straight men are seriously that shallow. As a woman, be in reasonable shape, take care of your skin, maybe grow your hair out, most straight men will consider you.
But that makes men "shallow" according to a lot of women.
Some of the very same women - "Well I want him to be 6ft, have a beard, go to the gym and work out far harder than women have to, have a good job, don't be balding... *proceeds to list 10 other things*"
Not saying this is all women and all men, there are women who aren't shallow and men who definitely are, but on the whole I do think women are far pickier than men. And then a lot of them play victim deflecting about how "shallow" men are when men point it out. I'm pretty sure a butthurt woman will call me out and try to argue with me over this very post, but that will just prove my point.
PS - Most pressure on women to look good, be super skinny and plaster makeup all over their faces comes from other women and the fashion industry (run almost exclusively by women and gay men), not from straight men.
Tall and large-framed women have the same problems. Most men don't want to be with a woman who's bigger than him. Most men don't want an 'unfeminine' woman (muscular, large bone structure, etc...not fat but imposing natural body structure). Even if she's not bigger than him, if she's too unfeminine or manly looking then she's out. A lot of men are put off by a woman having 'masculine' interests, hobbies, or occupations. And tons of men don't want their woman to earn more money than them.
Remember the Seinfeld episode where that woman Jerry dated had 'man hands'?
I think you're giving men wayyyy too much credit here and failing to see the other side. You seem to be imagining this from the perspective of an 'ideal' woman and ignoring the struggles of women outside of that range.
P.S. Try showing up for a date as a woman without shaving most of your body hair, dressing up and spending at least some time on your hair. Men definitely do expect a certain level of maintenance and thanks to porn most expect hairless armpits, legs and privates. No straight woman is shaving her whole lower body for other women, it's because it's generally expected by men. Ask most any woman...not dating/getting laid?...she's probably not shaving. And men don't tend to realize how much effort goes into even a 'natural' appearance. Men like to say they like no make-up but they don't even realize that the looks they like that are 'natural' involve a lot of work.
I'm a girl and my bf is the same height as me (although, I'm a little taller than average for a girl). It's super hot imo, even though I've always loved tall people too. I've seen some very cute short guys (to be honest I don't really notice when people are shorter than me unless I really think about it). im sure a lot of people do judge by height but don't be discouraged, the one for you will not be like that.
Thanks, curious how tall are you? I've dated a few girls my height, an inch or two shorter is about the avg that I date. So 5'5-5'3. I asked a short girl one time why she only dates tall guys, said she didnt want to have short kids, another told me they just feel safer and think tall guys are more manly.
I'm about 3 inches taller than you. Being tall is just one thing I find cute about guys, but truthfully being short can be very cute as well. Height is more of a secondary thing, since i really love the guy he could be tall or short and I'd find it cute because it's him.
I don't think tall guys are more manly or anything like that, and to think of how it may affect our children just seems a bit odd. That'd be like saying I don't want to date someone who wears glasses because then our kids might have poor vision. Besides, growing up unusually tall, especially for a girl, would be just as awkward, I'd think.
They're probably using your height as a convenient excuse.
Short guys can definitely get passed up in a first-glance scenario just the same as tall/masculine women do but they have a chance if they are likeable and have something else going for them. Don't act like short men are this special category and no woman faces the same things if she falls outside the range.
Me personally, I don't really notice height unless it's extreme one way or the other. I've dated guys who were smaller than me. Guess what? I heard plenty of shit for it too. I've been made to feel bad for being on the taller side (not even that tall @ 5'7) and the guy involved has gotten shit for it too. Mostly from other guys!
I've ran into that too. When waswith a taller girl, her friends gave us shit recentlyabout it! They used to tell me she was gonna leave me for a taller guy! She'd apologize, apparently she let it slip one time she thought I was perfect except for my height. It still kind of affected us.
I'm trying to make sense of your statement. My advice to OP was that he shouldn't use height as an excuse because in doing so, that mentality will hold him back.
He can't change his height but he can change his perspective. And if you're just posting to send me your sweet nothings, do so in a PM instead. Please don't waste space on a comment.
Take heart Tom Cruise is about your height. As long as you don't become a crazy Scientologist kook like him you should be fine.
I think he just gets laid because he is famous, never saw why else women would be attracted to him
The Scientology thing is enough to scare me away from anyone! Seriously, I mean it with every fiber of my being.
I think 'multimillionaire scientologist' may be a relevant description , re. his attractiveness.
;o)
Typical Liberal, all about tolerance, until it's different than their talking points.
It's very bizarre but keep in mind, many were born into it and others were manipulated and blackmailed into it. They make it pretty rough for people to get out. I'd hesitate to judge-on a personal level-until you knew the whole story.
They say that height on a guy is like tits on a girl, but they're wrong: us guys can see A-cup girls as potential mates, whereas short guys might as well be invisible. Women are far pickier than we are, and many won't give you a chance.
It is a handicap and one you will have to deal with. You'll find that using height as an excuse is something that can only hold you back. Whatever you do, don't take advice from women when it comes to attracting them.
Did it ever occur to you how many women feel invisible too? It's not strictly a male problem. It's also worth noting that while maybe any woman can 'get laid', that does essentially nothing for her, in fact can do quite the opposite (slut shaming) and gaining nothing, not even an orgasm, from the encounter. Any guy can get laid too, for as little as $5 and a lot less shame on his part. The woman 'getting laid' is having sex with a guy too, so for every easy lay a guy is getting some too. I love it how guys like to say it's so easy and all a woman has to do is open her legs but you fail to recognize that if a woman 'just opens her legs' then no guy did all this 'hard work' to get that pussy. She just laid back and let it happen. But nope, every guy has to work so hard for it! But yet there's all these women just laying back asking for it. Well obviously at least some guys aren't doing shit for 'work' if women are giving it up like that, just laying back and beckoning it. Pick one. You can't stand on both sides saying men work so hard for sex yet women just lay back and rake it in.
Can't say I've been watching the markets, but 5 bucks seems like quite the bargain. I'm going to make a few statements and if you disagree with them, that's fine, but that's probably were our discussion is going to crumple:
1) It is easier for a woman to be considered attractive to men than for a man to be considered attractive to women.
2) Because of relationship dynamics, men much more often have to initiate than women do. Maybe it's society, maybe it's because women are more risk-averse, but it's not too important why this is. It just is.
3) Because of 2), we can say it is harder/more effort/more risk for a man to attract women than the other way around.
The male 'player' has to be high-value: there's just more involved with being the seducer than the seducee. Most people can sit around, look pretty and—in the slut's case—have loose morals.
I hope that clarifies why this 'double standard' doesn't exist.
Well, if you really believe that then you're putting yourself below women and acting accordingly. Don't blame what comes of that on anyone but yourself. You're also seriously discounting the experiences of women who fall outside the stereotypical desireable range. It's convenient to say that they could get laid if they just open their legs but as far as having meaningful relationships, being taken seriously, being cared about? That's another story.
Leave the poor straw man alone, he didn't do anything. My statements in no way place me or men below women, I was trying to explain why there's a different perception of men who get laid a bunch vs women who get laid a bunch.
You bring up a good point: what happens to women who fall outside of 'desirable range'. To that I'll say this: unless you are morbidly obese, psychotic or disfigured there will be a decent amount of men* who find you attractive enough to date and care about.
*The problem is, these men aren't the high-value, attractive sort that women can see. Maybe they're potbellied and 5'6", have a weak chin or collect trash for a living. This is what I mean when I say that men see more women as possible mates than the other way around.
Yeah, no 5'6....fat...or garbage man...EVER gets laid, let alone is in a relationship.
Tell that to the short fat garbage man from my old hometown. He apparently didn't get that memo. And if you want to make it about money, well my best male friend worked there and made good money and always wanted to go out with me but I wasn't interested because I simply did not like him in that way. Had nothing to do with his looks or money or even dick size (he 'accidentally' showed me a picture), I just did not like him romantically. Period. Working for the garbage man was one of the best gigs you can get around there. True in a lot of other places too.
And attractive people have an easier time hooking up and getting in relationships than non-attractive people? Wow, major insight. You're just claiming it's easier for unattractive women than men. No proof and no sound reasoning provided.
For every unattractive person in a relationship, there's another party involved. Where is this supply of overly-attractive men that are settling for unattractive women because they just can't do better? Why can't they do better? Do they even exist?
I am only an inch taller than you and I have the same experience. Women would rather prefer to be single forever than caught being seen in public with me. Taller women have told me that they feel like my bodyguard, women around my height say they like wearing heels so it wouldn't work, and shorter women tend to have a huge fetish for really tall men so they are out of the question. There's just no hope for short guys, I feel your pain.
I dont think height matters. I dont know why it should matter to these girls.
These girls should look for personality and if you treat her right, not something artificial as height ffs.
What if you and her got along GREAT, but the only problem was your height. I think thats very silly and ridiculous
And its not like your extremely short anyway. 5'6" is decent height. I know its everyones choice, but that kinda seems artificial to me.
People like what they like. You can't change that.
Personally, I LOVE short guys. (5'6" is a bit tall for me.)
So it makes sense that other people would like taller guys...
You just need to find someone who (wisely) likes short guys. :)
I like shorter men. 5' 6" would be the perfect height for a guy imo!! Alot of taller men approach me but I'd really like a guy your height. There's hope.