I'm not sure how helpful I can be since this is such a difficultchoice for a person to make, I can't even imagine how hard it must be.
Firstly, I definitely believe that it is possible to love more than one person at the same time, you can't help the way you feel. So please don't beat yourself up about it!
In my opinion, 19 is waaay too young to marry, but that's just my opinion. If you are having doubts as big as these, then you need to seriously question how the rest of your life will be. You may live another 60 or 70 years with this man, that's a long time, so it really is a huge commitment. Of course divorce us an option, but nobody wants to end up at that point. On the other hand though, there are couples who marry at a young age and have long happy marriages spanning decades:)
Perhaps postponing a wedding until you feel sure about what you want to do, you really don't want to be impulsive. And I strongly suggest that you don't cheat, it's reckless and harmful. Most people end up regreting it.
Most importantly, talk to your fiance, and let him know that his behaviour is damaging the relationship. Either he will get his act together which may help your decision,or he won't, in which case you shouldn't have to be the only one working for the relationship.
I know you want to make the other guy happy, but you need to make yourself happy. You shouldn't live for other people, do what you want! It's your life!
If I were in your situation, I would probably go for neither, and just be by myself for however long I wanted. That way I get to think without the pressure of having to make an immediate decision. Also, being alone with your thoughts is helpful, and often people find that they enjoy having that freedom and realise that they aren't ready for anything big,. However, it's easier said than done.
I hope this helps, and just make sure you think carefully and take as much time as you need. Good luck, I hope it all goes well:D!!
IIN to be so in love, but develop strong feelings for someone else?
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I'm not sure how helpful I can be since this is such a difficultchoice for a person to make, I can't even imagine how hard it must be.
Firstly, I definitely believe that it is possible to love more than one person at the same time, you can't help the way you feel. So please don't beat yourself up about it!
In my opinion, 19 is waaay too young to marry, but that's just my opinion. If you are having doubts as big as these, then you need to seriously question how the rest of your life will be. You may live another 60 or 70 years with this man, that's a long time, so it really is a huge commitment. Of course divorce us an option, but nobody wants to end up at that point. On the other hand though, there are couples who marry at a young age and have long happy marriages spanning decades:)
Perhaps postponing a wedding until you feel sure about what you want to do, you really don't want to be impulsive. And I strongly suggest that you don't cheat, it's reckless and harmful. Most people end up regreting it.
Most importantly, talk to your fiance, and let him know that his behaviour is damaging the relationship. Either he will get his act together which may help your decision,or he won't, in which case you shouldn't have to be the only one working for the relationship.
I know you want to make the other guy happy, but you need to make yourself happy. You shouldn't live for other people, do what you want! It's your life!
If I were in your situation, I would probably go for neither, and just be by myself for however long I wanted. That way I get to think without the pressure of having to make an immediate decision. Also, being alone with your thoughts is helpful, and often people find that they enjoy having that freedom and realise that they aren't ready for anything big,. However, it's easier said than done.
I hope this helps, and just make sure you think carefully and take as much time as you need. Good luck, I hope it all goes well:D!!