Is it normal to be jealous of my siblings?

I'm the oldest. I have two younger sibs who are married, have great jobs, children, new cars, and own their own homes. We are all still pretty young, me the oldest being 27, and I am so proud of them for becoming such productive people. They deserve every bit of what they have and I am happy for them, for the most part. A small part of me is very jealous of them, and it makes me feel very guilty. I rent, and although I live in a nice, safe neighborhood I couldn't afford to without a roommate. I have a great job, but I make about 1/3 of what they do. I'm single, no children. The only thing I feel that I have on them is my level of education is much higher than theirs, but it burns at the same time because they went to school for less than 1 year programs and are much better off than I am. I also drive a crappy late 90's car, which doesn't really bother me because I see vehicles As commuting appliances but our other relatives do tend to poke a bit of fun at me about it. I think what I am most jealous of is the children though. I desperately want to be a parent one day but am so far away from that right now.

I feel like a horrible person for not being able to be 100% happy for them. I'd say I'm at 80%, way too low. But I can't talk to anyone in my family about how I feel because I'm afraid they will think Im a jerk, Plus none of them have been in a situation like mine (if you can call it a situation). I can't find any articles on it on the Internet or anything either, so I'm left wondering if these feelings are normal.

Is It Normal?
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Comments ( 4 ) Sort: best | oldest
  • As the oldest of my siblings, I totally understand where you're coming from. It's definitely normal to be a bit jealous, and I don't think you need to worry.

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  • Maybe think of it this way: they were your younger siblings, they would have looked up to you. So in a way, you helped them be successful, you showed them the way and without you, maybe they wouldn't have what they have today. I'm actually the youngest of 3, and I'm jealous of my eldest sibling for assorted reasons. So it's not always the eldest sibling who feels a little jealous.

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  • You are such a sweet person. I melted just reading about your situation. Seriously, you are very normal. The oldest is the high achiever, but gets screwed somehow. Seriously, your neices and nephews will adore you; and at some point, your siblings will envy YOU. There's a ton of stress having kids, cars, houses, stuff. You're a gem.

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  • Burn down the house why they are sleeping, then play the poor only survivor. This will teach them and get you heaps of attention.

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