Is it normal to be "in love" with the same guy after two years?

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7 Comments

So here's my story: I had the biggest crush on this guy freshman year and my sister was friends with him so she was going to set us up. The thing is, this guy would always smile at me and we talked a lot, and I always felt like he liked me a little but I'm not the overly-flirty type so he might never know how much I liked him. Anyway, I found out months later of me and my sister discussing me and this boy gettin together- that she has been hooking up/had a thing with this boy for about a month. She didn't even tell me for that long and I found out through someone else. I pretended not to be upset or angry and eventually, months later, things ended between them. So basically I've never stopped liking this guy and I've tried to not think about him and like other guys but it's impossible. And now I have no idea what to do because I feel miserable.

Is It Normal?
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Comments ( 7 ) Sort: best | oldest
  • MissyKay
    13 years ago | pl

    My x of 8 years had a friend who was married but I always thought he was qute and funny... He got a deveorce and me and him started talking as friends and I kept falling further in love with him... I ended up dumping the guy I had been with for 5 years to try and get my crush to date me.... Things were going well we talked all day every day flirting untill my x found out and flipped... And my crush felt bad so he stoped talking to me.... I got back with my x for 3 more years still always thinking about his friend...... But I left him for other reasons and dated some one else for a little while and my sis hooked up with the guy I liked... I still was totaly obsessed with him but knew he wouldn't do that to my x..... Omg long story short him and my sis broke up and him and i hung out just as friends at a get together and out of nowhere he kissed me I was in SHOCK!!! We have now been together for 2 years and I have loved him for many years even before we started dateing I was madly in love with him and still am!!!

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  • ArayaLioness
    8 years ago | pl

    It's normal, but I think it would suck. I honestly wouldn't want my sister's sloppy seconds.

    I would have definitely confronted her about what a gross thing she did and I don't think I'd trust that guy.

    But it's normal.

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  • [Old Memory]
    13 years ago | pl

    yea iz normal.......is happenin to me rite now.......

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  • dada1993
    13 years ago | pl

    The thing is I'm actually not a doormat. Do you think I should have yelled at her when I had a chance?

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  • [Old Memory]
    13 years ago | pl

    I think what your sister did was mean - she knew you liked him tells you she'll set you up, and then goes for him herself behind your back?

    I don't think your problem is this boy, or your sister, though I'd watch your back there. I think your problem is you are passive, unassertive & kind of a door mat. Look for self development opportunities. If you are in college there are lots of workshops. So get a spine then go get a life for yourself- you can do it!!!

    PS - I writing course might help you too.

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  • MissyKay
    13 years ago | pl

    Why can't she be with him??? Just because her sister dated him is not a good reason! Her sister dated him knowing she liked him so why should she not date him cause her sis did??? Her sis didn't think about her feelings why should she think about her sisters? My sister dated the guy I liked and I was ok with it at first because my sis always dates jerks and I knew he was a good guy... Then she started talking down on him and cheating on him and I was pissed!.... She was a little mad when I told her him and I were going to try dateing but she got over it and like I said we have been together for 2 yrs and I am so happy and even all the dreams and thoughts I had before we were together of us being together are nothing compared to what it's like being with him in real life!!!

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  • grumpybarbie
    13 years ago | pl

    Yikes!! Well, there's the code to consider, now that she's had him, you can't, even if she says it's okay it won't be and no dude is worth that kind of resentment that she might hold if you do hook up! You just have to try and put him out of your head. Don't worry, soon enough someone will come along and set your heart all a flutter!!

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