Is it normal to be attached to a teenaged girl when you're twenty
Okay this story will need background to make sense. I grew up pretty much normal for the first half of my life, but when high school rolled around I was home schooled the entire time. I never dated, and had no friends or social life until recently. Because of a really rough financial slump my single mother hit(the main reason I wouldn't socialise,interact or date), we were poor most of the time.
Where I'm from school is all paid for, and my relatives whom have come to our financial aid insisted that I finish my high school education rather than go get a blue collar job like I really wanted to do (I had software engineering certification I wanted to complete, the blue collar job would've paid for that but I digress).
So now I'm 20 and back in high school, the last place I wanted to be back in, but since I can't get the programming or blue collar jobs I want (I live in the third world you see) I have to fall in line with what my mom and the rest of the family tells me to do.
I didn't want to make any connections at school coz well...they're all strictly speaking kids! I have better conversations with the teachers, about life,politics etc. No one's noticed my age coz I look 15 anyway.
Then this girl shows up,she's a 17 year old senior(turning 18) and thinks I'm actually 16 (head mistress said to keep my real age secret since I feel out of place among the students anyway)the school bus ride is two hours long, to and from school, and she's the closest person to my age that I can talk to, and man do we talk! She's my brother's age, and thinks she's older than us both. We've ended up getting along so well, people think we're either related or something else is going on. My brother thinks something is gonna happen between me and her, but I keep saying nothing could, though she's physically my type, we don't have much in common except this attachment (for lack of a better term)
I'm not supposed to get attached like this to someone I've barely known a month, yet now she tells me just about EVERYTHING, especially stuff she thinks people judge her for (of course none of it bothers me,teenaged mistakes are behind me).
We text each other every morning and at night,and I always know when something's wrong in her world. I get all protective of her, and she's given me a cute nickname for it (Agent 47).
I wouldn't be dating this girl in my ideal situation, coz at the very least I should be in college with girls my own age not stopping myself from talking like a 20 year old. I've never had a girlfriend or anything like that and I have told her that I mean no romance but ,I'm now throwing myself between her and any guy she feels harassed by (she seems to like that). What the hell am I doing here, coz I really don't know what to feel about this,normally I'd just stick to my family, my phone,the things I'm passionate about and sadly this school nonsense. Not things that feel ambiguous, wrong and possibly very very BAD.
Can someone please be brutally honest with me here.