Is it normal to be afraid to make a compliment?

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I was having dinner with two nice girls (I am not interested in either of them and I think neither are) and one of them has a nice blond hair and then in the candlelight she was so pretty, especially when she was smiling. I was in awe and I so wanted to tell her "wow you look so beautiful with your golden hair and lucent skin, you look like an angel". But I thought of what might happen, she'd probably have laughed and thanked me but probably both of them would have thought I was this weird psycho so I just pretended I didn't notice anything. I mean nowadays I think it's just not proper to make a compliment unless someone gets a new haircut or dress or you haven't noticed her earrings before. Personal, really honest compliments like this are shunned, unless it's your GF or you're on a date (but probably not the first date). I thought about just being honest to everybody but it doesn't sound right. So am I normal to overthink this? What would you have done?

Is It Normal?
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  • coloredpencils
    13 years ago | pl

    Coming from a woman it is great to hear compliments from people male female friends whatever... Maybe take out the lucent angel part if you're not that close with the girl... but a "You know tonight you look really good, I really like how you did your hair" Not only will it be a boost for the girl but you can make someone feel happy :) If you know her really well then go for the more intimate compliments about her looking like an angel. But trust me everyone loves to be complimented

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  • Lockets
    13 years ago | pl

    Hmmm, tricky one. It is good to think these thoughts, to really like the look of something and to want to express it but the problem lies with how it is taken.
    Maybe it would have been inappropriate if you had said it to the blonde girl that night because her friend may have been jealous and the blonde one may have been embarassed. It also depends on how well you know someone. If she is a really good friend and she trusts you and knows that you are not trying to come on to her, maybe you could say this sort of thing on a one-to-one occasion. I know how you feel about this-I often want to say really nice things to people but I have to bite my tongue too!

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    • fuzzylumpkins
      13 years ago | pl

      I hate receiving compliments on my looks. Everything else is okay, like "oh my, you have such good taste in shoes crockery , whatever" But the moment anyone says anything about my appearance, I feel naked. So yeh, maybe keeping thoughts like that to yourself is not a bad idea.

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  • 53739
    7 years ago | pl

    That would have been totally weird.

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  • [Old Memory]
    13 years ago | pl

    You are right about over-thinking this. Stop the mind reading as if you can tell what someone will think about a compliment.

    Sharing a genuine & complimentary observation sincerely with a friend, or an acquaintance is a kind thing to do. Everyone likes to be appreciated.

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  • niturk20
    13 years ago | pl

    I don't like making compliments because I'm afraid people will take them the wrong way and the last thing I need is an admirer that I dont admire back.

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  • sojourner
    13 years ago | pl

    One more thing, it means a lot more to someone if you compliment them in the presense of someone else. It is taken as much more sincere. This is one of the easiest ways to look a hero. Why? Because it shows a certain bravery, gallantry, and that you are "big" enough to give someone else recognition.

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  • sojourner
    13 years ago | pl

    A logical solution would be to start out with a few "easy" compliments and go from there. That's how you learn and grow. You don't grow into an interesting person or a person you like by being held back by fears. I think the way that you expressed that compliment was beautiful. It was genuine, and in the circumstance, quite appropriate. If anyone thinks you are weird for it, they have their own problem.

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