I get scared driving too. My mom was poor while I was growing up, so there was no family car for me to learn in. I'm turning 22 next month. I got my permit when my mom said she'd buy a car. She never bought a car until right after I moved out on bad terms with her. My permit expired and now I'm on my second permit and have been driving my girlfriend's car off and on. My body tenses up and I'm constantly paranoid. I'm so used to riding a bicycle, since it's all I could ever afford to drive. I think it has to do with the way I was raised. My mother was such a paranoid control freak, and didn't let me do anything on my own and constantly pounded into my head about all the bad things that could happen to me. I was also verbally/psychologically abused by her and constantly being put-down and called names by her. As a result, I'm now a paranoid nervous wreck, scared to death about screwing up even a little. I've even had at least a couple of panic attacks before (thankfully not while driving!). I have my mother to thank for me being so screwed up. To all who doubt me, or think I'm full of BS, or I'm being mean to my mother, go check out myspace.com/insanepsychomom
Thanks for your responses. I did fail my third test (somehow, right when I pulled out, there was another car behind me, even though I looked back and saw nothing). Predictably, I felt like crap, but I scheduled the next test available. I was able to hold it together enough to pass -- no points off!
I'm still a bit tense and nervous about driving, especially at night or when there are nuts on the road (and this is Long Island, so that's far from rare). But though I know I need to practice more often, I'm getting there.
Brian, I'm sorry to hear about your predicament. I could never call my mother abusive, but she was very overprotective and cringed at seeing "her baby" take the wheel. She got over that, but it sounds like that's not an option for you. It's tough when you're in such a bad situation, because nursing your wounds won't necessarily help, and neither will listening to unthinking people telling you to "stop feeling sorry for yourself."
The best I can offer you is to remind you that, if you do manage to keep your fears in check and get your license, you will have a great deal more independence for your mother. Keep that endpoint in mind, and work for it. It's obvious you need to get away from her, so make it your goal to do that by car.
Is it normal to be afraid of driving?
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I get scared driving too. My mom was poor while I was growing up, so there was no family car for me to learn in. I'm turning 22 next month. I got my permit when my mom said she'd buy a car. She never bought a car until right after I moved out on bad terms with her. My permit expired and now I'm on my second permit and have been driving my girlfriend's car off and on. My body tenses up and I'm constantly paranoid. I'm so used to riding a bicycle, since it's all I could ever afford to drive. I think it has to do with the way I was raised. My mother was such a paranoid control freak, and didn't let me do anything on my own and constantly pounded into my head about all the bad things that could happen to me. I was also verbally/psychologically abused by her and constantly being put-down and called names by her. As a result, I'm now a paranoid nervous wreck, scared to death about screwing up even a little. I've even had at least a couple of panic attacks before (thankfully not while driving!). I have my mother to thank for me being so screwed up. To all who doubt me, or think I'm full of BS, or I'm being mean to my mother, go check out myspace.com/insanepsychomom
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misskubelik
13 years ago
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Hi folks, this is the OP
Thanks for your responses. I did fail my third test (somehow, right when I pulled out, there was another car behind me, even though I looked back and saw nothing). Predictably, I felt like crap, but I scheduled the next test available. I was able to hold it together enough to pass -- no points off!
I'm still a bit tense and nervous about driving, especially at night or when there are nuts on the road (and this is Long Island, so that's far from rare). But though I know I need to practice more often, I'm getting there.
Brian, I'm sorry to hear about your predicament. I could never call my mother abusive, but she was very overprotective and cringed at seeing "her baby" take the wheel. She got over that, but it sounds like that's not an option for you. It's tough when you're in such a bad situation, because nursing your wounds won't necessarily help, and neither will listening to unthinking people telling you to "stop feeling sorry for yourself."
The best I can offer you is to remind you that, if you do manage to keep your fears in check and get your license, you will have a great deal more independence for your mother. Keep that endpoint in mind, and work for it. It's obvious you need to get away from her, so make it your goal to do that by car.