Giiirl, I can definitely relate growing up in a strict African household as well.
You know what, your virginity is one of those things that you have once, and you choose who you give it away too.
My personal philosophy is to save my virginity not because of What guys will think, or religion, but because having a sexual relationship with someone is making yourself vulnerable to a bond that is very strong. I'm going to wait until marriage, until I find the right person because I just can't casually sleep with someone, and have them walk out on me the next day. I would be too emotionally attached... I have to know that they are there because we connect on an intellectual, emotional, and physical level while at the same time in a stable relationship. I have to know that he also thinks I'm the one, and he has no problem spending the rest of his life with me. If he truly cares, and loves you, then marriage would be no problem to him. Your emotions are yours, some guys just want to fuck and be done with you. They want to use your beauty. Sometimes you think you know what guys will do that... but even those that seem good at first have subtle motives. You just have to play it safe sis. I've seen so many of my guy friends de-virginate girls and almost instantly treat them like trash. To some guys, you are just a game to play.
You see your friends around you, and the pop culture having sex before marriage. There is nothing wrong with that. That's their choice, and their personal belief. It doesn't make you any better, or less of a person. There is also nothing wrong with not having sex before your age, or having sex at a later age. Sometimes you just want to jump into things... but the best advice that I was given to me was to wait it out. And know that you're not weird, or abnormal. And you're also not alone. In the end it is ultimately your choice. Whatever works for you :)
Sometimes that late blooming flower is the most beautiful of them all. Trust me, the right one will come when you least expect it... God always has a way of doing things.
Is it normal to be 23 and never had a BF or done the deed?
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Giiirl, I can definitely relate growing up in a strict African household as well.
You know what, your virginity is one of those things that you have once, and you choose who you give it away too.
My personal philosophy is to save my virginity not because of What guys will think, or religion, but because having a sexual relationship with someone is making yourself vulnerable to a bond that is very strong. I'm going to wait until marriage, until I find the right person because I just can't casually sleep with someone, and have them walk out on me the next day. I would be too emotionally attached... I have to know that they are there because we connect on an intellectual, emotional, and physical level while at the same time in a stable relationship. I have to know that he also thinks I'm the one, and he has no problem spending the rest of his life with me. If he truly cares, and loves you, then marriage would be no problem to him. Your emotions are yours, some guys just want to fuck and be done with you. They want to use your beauty. Sometimes you think you know what guys will do that... but even those that seem good at first have subtle motives. You just have to play it safe sis. I've seen so many of my guy friends de-virginate girls and almost instantly treat them like trash. To some guys, you are just a game to play.
You see your friends around you, and the pop culture having sex before marriage. There is nothing wrong with that. That's their choice, and their personal belief. It doesn't make you any better, or less of a person. There is also nothing wrong with not having sex before your age, or having sex at a later age. Sometimes you just want to jump into things... but the best advice that I was given to me was to wait it out. And know that you're not weird, or abnormal. And you're also not alone. In the end it is ultimately your choice. Whatever works for you :)
Sometimes that late blooming flower is the most beautiful of them all. Trust me, the right one will come when you least expect it... God always has a way of doing things.
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sweethokie21
10 years ago
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sweethokie21
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i mean i hope to find a great guy that i wont hesitate with but idk if that will ever happen....
Man...I hope so. Everyone always says that...idk if I still believe that...