Okay... I honestly don't like the fact that you've had sex with someone else and not told him... That's the horrible kind of cheating, leading him to believe everything is fine. Just to let you know, the longer you keep it a secret the harder it's going to hit him and the more likeliness it has to ruin everything - especially if he finds out himself (which will happen eventually).
Swinging is your best option if you want your relationship to survive... The thing is you need to be clear with your husband and tell him if he's banging other women then you get to bang other men... Here's the logic behind it:
If you bang someone, and keep it a secret - it's cheating.
If you talk to your partner about it, gain permission and they know it's happened, it's not cheating.
It's an amazing way to spice up the sex life, I mean, I'm only 19 so I'm not that experienced in the swingers life but I have a good relationship with my parents and know they live that lifestyle and once you get past that point with the whole permission concept and you start to fool around with other people, you'll enjoy it, and end up with other couples as well (which is one of the most exciting kinds, I've had sex with a woman while her husband was watching before)
It won't work if you're not both on board and both have the same abilities as the other to go out and do it because if he gets to bang other women and you don't get to bang other men, jealousy is eventually going to play a part.
is it normal that thinkin about having sex with other men turns me on?
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Okay... I honestly don't like the fact that you've had sex with someone else and not told him... That's the horrible kind of cheating, leading him to believe everything is fine. Just to let you know, the longer you keep it a secret the harder it's going to hit him and the more likeliness it has to ruin everything - especially if he finds out himself (which will happen eventually).
Swinging is your best option if you want your relationship to survive... The thing is you need to be clear with your husband and tell him if he's banging other women then you get to bang other men... Here's the logic behind it:
If you bang someone, and keep it a secret - it's cheating.
If you talk to your partner about it, gain permission and they know it's happened, it's not cheating.
It's an amazing way to spice up the sex life, I mean, I'm only 19 so I'm not that experienced in the swingers life but I have a good relationship with my parents and know they live that lifestyle and once you get past that point with the whole permission concept and you start to fool around with other people, you'll enjoy it, and end up with other couples as well (which is one of the most exciting kinds, I've had sex with a woman while her husband was watching before)
It won't work if you're not both on board and both have the same abilities as the other to go out and do it because if he gets to bang other women and you don't get to bang other men, jealousy is eventually going to play a part.