That last sentence is the obvious way to go .. now why didn't I think of suggesting that? Or her family? Surely they would've noticed and said something?
I asked my parents and they don't smell anything. My mom is the type of person who will definitely tell you the truth if you ask her. She's a clean person herself and she would notice if I smelled bad. All my family tells me that I smell fine and they don't smell any odor emitting from me. Its just when I go to school and sit with friends then the faces start and the complaints. Once my friend even came to my house and every time I left the room she would spray it with Febreze. It was so rude so I just told her its not nice to spray my room every time I leave and that I'm already choking from the smell. She also "jokingly" told me did you fart? When was the last time you showered? I hadn't farted the whole time and it was just really rude. I shower everyday and this shit still happens to me. Every night I shower and in the morning before leaving to school I spray a bit of perfume and put deodorant and clean clothes and leave. It might just be my "friends" making fun of me but its even people i dont know.
You are being bullied by some really nasty spiteful people. These are NOT friends! Especially not the one with the spray can.
I don't know what you do about morons like this except try and ignore them, stay away from them, stop imagining they're your friends because they so obviously are so not. I know it's hard, but they do it to get a reaction to bolster up their own petty little egos. Is there anyone at school you can talk to, a counsellor or similar?
I'd also suggest you have a look around at school, I'll bet there are some other people who've been made outcast by these or similar fuckwits, maybe you could get together and give each other some mutual support?
Thanks for the advice, my family also gives me similar advice. I will try to slowly stay away from these kids. Like you know not all at once, but slowly to the point where we aren't that close because seriously I don't need these people in my life you're right. It's not like I haven't thought about stopping to talk with them, its just one of these girls is just supposedly one of my closest friends and even though she treats me this way she still invites me to her house and talks with me. I feel like I'm her "backup plan" and I am nobody's back up plan thats for sure. I'll just ignore her because she really acts horrible towards me and she thinks shes right in the way she acts. I can't stand people like that. I can't believe I actually still involve myself with people like this.
I'll try to surround myself more with nicer kids who don't try to purposefully ruin my day. Hopefully I'll succeed in that.
I'm not really up for talking to a counselor because I'm hoping this will all blow over and I'm trying my hardest to stand strong and ignore most of whats happening. Plus it won't help because in my previous school I got the counselor involved and she really didn't help at all. At first I thought she wanted to but she wasn't really into understanding me and the situation. She was occupied more on blaming it on me. I'll update on whats happening in my situation and if it even gets any better.
This "back up" so-called friend is using you, don't accept her invitations and let her wonder why: it's OK to just say "I don't want to come to your house" with no explanation - let her sweat!
I wouldn't dismiss all the counsellors in the world because you didn't get what you needed the only time you tried! But of course that's totally up to you - counsellors don't have magic wands or solutions, although some pretend they do, but often they can help you get through bad times quicker by being impartial sounding boards. Bullying could never be the victim's fault, but certainly people who are a bit different or with low self esteem are prime targets, maybe that's what she meant? Being a loner is fine if that's how you are, but low self esteem can be changed: I know it can!
I took your advice and I didn't immediately talk to her at school. Usually when I see her and some other girls I come up to them and start chatting right away and I initiate conversations because they sometimes ignore me like I'm a wall (Its frustrating). This time I was patient and I didn't run up to them because if they were really interested in talking to me they would start a conversation with me instead of me jumping head first all the time. And I did see a change its like they were missing the attention that I was giving them. I wasn't paying attention to them so much more and I feel its definitely going to be for the better. I chatted with the other girls who are nicer.
I'm not a loner myself, maybe I appear not so confident sometimes but I definitely am more social this year at school. I don't hang out alone, I socialize with friends and I sit with a couple of kids and eat with them during lunch. (The girls who make the gestures and say that theres always a smell when I'm around are also part of this little group. Like I said above I'm not paying them mind so much but I'm talking to the nice girls who sit with them).
If you ever see me I usually have a poker face on. But when I'm socializing I'm smiling and what not. I've been told a couple of times that I'm pretty and I personally think that I'm not unattractive where people would make fun of me for my looks (sorry I'm trying to give you an idea).I don't have any special needs or that much low self esteem that they would pick on me for, I think its directed more towards the situation of "smell" or "odor" or whatever they are smelling if they even are smelling anything. I'm staying strong though, I'm trying not show at least that I'm paying attention to this.
I really appreciate your effort to help me in my situation! Thanks for all the tips this goes out to everybody else who helped as well :)
I'm so glad your situation at school as changed for the better! Even if it's only a small improvement right now, you can build on it and move on from this painful stage in your life.
Don't forget YOU changed it by changing how you responded to these idiots: congratulations and I'm really pleased if anything I wrote helped. I was passing on the message of my favourite quote of all time, from Victor Frankl's book "Man's Search Meaning" to the effect that there's one freedom no-one can take away from us, the freedom to decide how to respond to any given situation .... he survived Auschwitz so I reckon he knew what he was talking about.
Is it normal that people around me act as if I smell?
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That last sentence is the obvious way to go .. now why didn't I think of suggesting that? Or her family? Surely they would've noticed and said something?
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StanlaRodgers
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ChocolatePrincess
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I asked my parents and they don't smell anything. My mom is the type of person who will definitely tell you the truth if you ask her. She's a clean person herself and she would notice if I smelled bad. All my family tells me that I smell fine and they don't smell any odor emitting from me. Its just when I go to school and sit with friends then the faces start and the complaints. Once my friend even came to my house and every time I left the room she would spray it with Febreze. It was so rude so I just told her its not nice to spray my room every time I leave and that I'm already choking from the smell. She also "jokingly" told me did you fart? When was the last time you showered? I hadn't farted the whole time and it was just really rude. I shower everyday and this shit still happens to me. Every night I shower and in the morning before leaving to school I spray a bit of perfume and put deodorant and clean clothes and leave. It might just be my "friends" making fun of me but its even people i dont know.
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Ellenna
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You are being bullied by some really nasty spiteful people. These are NOT friends! Especially not the one with the spray can.
I don't know what you do about morons like this except try and ignore them, stay away from them, stop imagining they're your friends because they so obviously are so not. I know it's hard, but they do it to get a reaction to bolster up their own petty little egos. Is there anyone at school you can talk to, a counsellor or similar?
I'd also suggest you have a look around at school, I'll bet there are some other people who've been made outcast by these or similar fuckwits, maybe you could get together and give each other some mutual support?
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StanlaRodgers
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Thanks for the advice, my family also gives me similar advice. I will try to slowly stay away from these kids. Like you know not all at once, but slowly to the point where we aren't that close because seriously I don't need these people in my life you're right. It's not like I haven't thought about stopping to talk with them, its just one of these girls is just supposedly one of my closest friends and even though she treats me this way she still invites me to her house and talks with me. I feel like I'm her "backup plan" and I am nobody's back up plan thats for sure. I'll just ignore her because she really acts horrible towards me and she thinks shes right in the way she acts. I can't stand people like that. I can't believe I actually still involve myself with people like this.
I'll try to surround myself more with nicer kids who don't try to purposefully ruin my day. Hopefully I'll succeed in that.
I'm not really up for talking to a counselor because I'm hoping this will all blow over and I'm trying my hardest to stand strong and ignore most of whats happening. Plus it won't help because in my previous school I got the counselor involved and she really didn't help at all. At first I thought she wanted to but she wasn't really into understanding me and the situation. She was occupied more on blaming it on me. I'll update on whats happening in my situation and if it even gets any better.
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Ellenna
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This "back up" so-called friend is using you, don't accept her invitations and let her wonder why: it's OK to just say "I don't want to come to your house" with no explanation - let her sweat!
I wouldn't dismiss all the counsellors in the world because you didn't get what you needed the only time you tried! But of course that's totally up to you - counsellors don't have magic wands or solutions, although some pretend they do, but often they can help you get through bad times quicker by being impartial sounding boards. Bullying could never be the victim's fault, but certainly people who are a bit different or with low self esteem are prime targets, maybe that's what she meant? Being a loner is fine if that's how you are, but low self esteem can be changed: I know it can!
Good luck however you decide to handle it
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StanlaRodgers
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I took your advice and I didn't immediately talk to her at school. Usually when I see her and some other girls I come up to them and start chatting right away and I initiate conversations because they sometimes ignore me like I'm a wall (Its frustrating). This time I was patient and I didn't run up to them because if they were really interested in talking to me they would start a conversation with me instead of me jumping head first all the time. And I did see a change its like they were missing the attention that I was giving them. I wasn't paying attention to them so much more and I feel its definitely going to be for the better. I chatted with the other girls who are nicer.
I'm not a loner myself, maybe I appear not so confident sometimes but I definitely am more social this year at school. I don't hang out alone, I socialize with friends and I sit with a couple of kids and eat with them during lunch. (The girls who make the gestures and say that theres always a smell when I'm around are also part of this little group. Like I said above I'm not paying them mind so much but I'm talking to the nice girls who sit with them).
If you ever see me I usually have a poker face on. But when I'm socializing I'm smiling and what not. I've been told a couple of times that I'm pretty and I personally think that I'm not unattractive where people would make fun of me for my looks (sorry I'm trying to give you an idea).I don't have any special needs or that much low self esteem that they would pick on me for, I think its directed more towards the situation of "smell" or "odor" or whatever they are smelling if they even are smelling anything. I'm staying strong though, I'm trying not show at least that I'm paying attention to this.
I really appreciate your effort to help me in my situation! Thanks for all the tips this goes out to everybody else who helped as well :)
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Ellenna
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I'm so glad your situation at school as changed for the better! Even if it's only a small improvement right now, you can build on it and move on from this painful stage in your life.
Don't forget YOU changed it by changing how you responded to these idiots: congratulations and I'm really pleased if anything I wrote helped. I was passing on the message of my favourite quote of all time, from Victor Frankl's book "Man's Search Meaning" to the effect that there's one freedom no-one can take away from us, the freedom to decide how to respond to any given situation .... he survived Auschwitz so I reckon he knew what he was talking about.
Everything good to you for 2015!
Well apparently they won't say nothing that this person has an odor. So he/she needs to ask someone instead of having people look at he/she sideways.
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Ellenna
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I agree - surely someone will have the honesty to say answer yes if asked Do I Smell?