That's a really awful situation, and I'm so sorry you're going through that.
You have to understand that, when leaving behind an addiction...
(and that's what junk food really IS- it is specifically designed in chemistry labs, I shit you not, to have the exact right balance of salt/sugar/fat to create a powerful chemical response in the brain like a drug, without being satiating or filling so you eat more and more...pretty fucked)
...when leaving behind an addiction and trying to better yourself, it's very, very, extremely common for people to feel like they are being 'sabatoged' by loved ones and friends.
It's a two part thing. They are still knee deep in their own addiction, so you admonishing the addictive behavior feels like a personal attack on their life choices. Also, they compartmentalize the addictive behavior...think about it, when you eat some candy, you don't think of it as a collective choice leading to bad consequences; you don't think of it as part of the big picture, you just think of it as one candy bar. That's normal. So when your mom is telling you to have one bag of chips, she's thinking about it as a one off, like an alcohoic's drinking buddy might think 'one beer' is no biggie. She hasn't gotten to the stage where she sees it as a part of a giant trajectory of bad life choices...it's just a few doritos to her. That's how people justify unhealthy behaviour to themselves. Just this once!
I'd encourage you to talk to her and tell her exactly how you feel, and tell her that you really struggle with controlling yourself. Maybe ask her to provide you with a LIMITED amount of time in a household free of foods that you struggle with.
The reason I say limited is because...
You need to eventually, once you kick the worst of the cravings and temptations, you need to eventually live in a world where the junk food is around. Because it IS there in the real world. It will be available. It will be in your face. You will have access to it. You're not gonna be living on a lesbian commune where there's only fresh herbs and homegrown radishes and roasted beets...you will have to say no to junk food if you want to eat healthy. And if you have a sustainable healthy diet, you should eat junk food sometimes, in reasonable portions and in a way that fits your diet. Eating healthy doesn't mean you never get to eat pizza or chips ever again. It means you have a healthy relationship with food and that means having access to junky food and learning how to say no sometimes. I think you'll get there once you step away from the habit.
Once you do, having access to that type of food is actually helpful, not harmful. What you need to do, is ask her for a month or two where she puts it out of sight, and then slowly incorporates it back. If she's resistant, be VERY open about how you feel. Talk about your dad if you need to. Tell her you want to spend time with her learning to cook some healthy recipes you found. Mom's love that shit.
You'll be ok. Just talk, without attacking her.
In the meantime, if you're struggling reddits r/loseit is a pretty good resource. Lots of people in the same boat as you with family & they just advocate calorie tracking, which includes occasional junk food. Might be helpful.
Anyway, good luck & I hope you can work things out with your mom
IIN that my mother sabotages my diet?
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That's a really awful situation, and I'm so sorry you're going through that.
You have to understand that, when leaving behind an addiction...
(and that's what junk food really IS- it is specifically designed in chemistry labs, I shit you not, to have the exact right balance of salt/sugar/fat to create a powerful chemical response in the brain like a drug, without being satiating or filling so you eat more and more...pretty fucked)
...when leaving behind an addiction and trying to better yourself, it's very, very, extremely common for people to feel like they are being 'sabatoged' by loved ones and friends.
It's a two part thing. They are still knee deep in their own addiction, so you admonishing the addictive behavior feels like a personal attack on their life choices. Also, they compartmentalize the addictive behavior...think about it, when you eat some candy, you don't think of it as a collective choice leading to bad consequences; you don't think of it as part of the big picture, you just think of it as one candy bar. That's normal. So when your mom is telling you to have one bag of chips, she's thinking about it as a one off, like an alcohoic's drinking buddy might think 'one beer' is no biggie. She hasn't gotten to the stage where she sees it as a part of a giant trajectory of bad life choices...it's just a few doritos to her. That's how people justify unhealthy behaviour to themselves. Just this once!
I'd encourage you to talk to her and tell her exactly how you feel, and tell her that you really struggle with controlling yourself. Maybe ask her to provide you with a LIMITED amount of time in a household free of foods that you struggle with.
The reason I say limited is because...
You need to eventually, once you kick the worst of the cravings and temptations, you need to eventually live in a world where the junk food is around. Because it IS there in the real world. It will be available. It will be in your face. You will have access to it. You're not gonna be living on a lesbian commune where there's only fresh herbs and homegrown radishes and roasted beets...you will have to say no to junk food if you want to eat healthy. And if you have a sustainable healthy diet, you should eat junk food sometimes, in reasonable portions and in a way that fits your diet. Eating healthy doesn't mean you never get to eat pizza or chips ever again. It means you have a healthy relationship with food and that means having access to junky food and learning how to say no sometimes. I think you'll get there once you step away from the habit.
Once you do, having access to that type of food is actually helpful, not harmful. What you need to do, is ask her for a month or two where she puts it out of sight, and then slowly incorporates it back. If she's resistant, be VERY open about how you feel. Talk about your dad if you need to. Tell her you want to spend time with her learning to cook some healthy recipes you found. Mom's love that shit.
You'll be ok. Just talk, without attacking her.
In the meantime, if you're struggling reddits r/loseit is a pretty good resource. Lots of people in the same boat as you with family & they just advocate calorie tracking, which includes occasional junk food. Might be helpful.
Anyway, good luck & I hope you can work things out with your mom