ok you don't want to help her, then leave.
Don't abuse her or talk down to her or make life harder for her than it already is.
She's your Mom, I'm sure there will be some support agency out there that will help her with food/bills.
Meanwhile you go out and buy a jet ski or whatever it is that is much too good than helping out your own Mom.
I've read your (possible mental) concerns about your Mom. She obviously needs support from someone so she can get back on her feet again. Who knows, that house may have also been GIVEN to you when she dies (or divided up between the family) Maybe your proportion should be lower?
If life is THAT hard for someone who has a house (or dwelling or whatever it is) ALL paid off, then maybe she should sell and leave to a 1 bedroom apartment. Quite obviously her life is coming to an end, and yours is just starting, good luck with your own kids support one day. Because it (financial hardship) can happen to the best of us.
Oh, and make sure to take some of those past loving family photos with you, otherwise your Mom might just cry every time she sees them. Good one, leave on a bad note, that'll work out for you!
haha you really don't get it, but that's expected online. i can't spend my life taking care of those that won't even help themselves, i still need to live my life.
i understand that she needs help from someone to get her back on her feet, but you can't expect her to GET HELP when she isn't even trying to. I can't make her do that. I'd love to, honestly, but she just doesn't want to put any effort into it.
she doesn't want to sell the house because it was given to her, so she doesn't have to spend any money on "rent" or other living situations. sure, she'd have a shit ton of money, but i think she's saving that for when her parents actually die and it becomes HER house. technically, the house isn't hers to sell anyways.
we don't have family photos. growing up, we weren't even a family, just people living together. it's not like she'll really give a shit when i'm gone. the only thing going through her head will be "now who will pay my bills for me? who will take care of my son?"
she isn't even my mom. she's my older roommate. trust me, she really doesn't care much about a "family" to begin with.
I trust what you are saying is true.
Because although most say trust should be earned, I've always had the opinion trust to begin with and 'then' if any issues happen lower that trust accordingly from there.
I'm sorry you haven't felt like "family" with her. I actually feel she may think of you as 'close' family anyway, but just in her own awkward way. She may not know exactly how to express herself 'properly', but the love is there, somewhere.
ok then. Move out for a while, it may be best for both of you (actually everyone). See how it goes (in other words don't sign 12 month contracts/leases with anyone just yet. I think after a couple of weeks you'll both know what's best, and then take it from there. By the way, it may be best NOT to stop contact with her, because sometimes when we forget to call or come around the days turn into weeks, the weeks turn into months, and eventually years pass by! Just make it that you'll contact every day or two, then keep to it.
No, you don't need my ok (or anyone's, but yourself) but it sure does help when things are a bit gray. Good luck.
Is it normal that my mom makes me pay rent like this?
↑ View this comment's parent
← View full post
ok you don't want to help her, then leave.
Don't abuse her or talk down to her or make life harder for her than it already is.
She's your Mom, I'm sure there will be some support agency out there that will help her with food/bills.
Meanwhile you go out and buy a jet ski or whatever it is that is much too good than helping out your own Mom.
I've read your (possible mental) concerns about your Mom. She obviously needs support from someone so she can get back on her feet again. Who knows, that house may have also been GIVEN to you when she dies (or divided up between the family) Maybe your proportion should be lower?
If life is THAT hard for someone who has a house (or dwelling or whatever it is) ALL paid off, then maybe she should sell and leave to a 1 bedroom apartment. Quite obviously her life is coming to an end, and yours is just starting, good luck with your own kids support one day. Because it (financial hardship) can happen to the best of us.
Oh, and make sure to take some of those past loving family photos with you, otherwise your Mom might just cry every time she sees them. Good one, leave on a bad note, that'll work out for you!
--
spazatikal
11 years ago
|
pl
Comment Hidden (
show
)
Report
0
0
haha you really don't get it, but that's expected online. i can't spend my life taking care of those that won't even help themselves, i still need to live my life.
i understand that she needs help from someone to get her back on her feet, but you can't expect her to GET HELP when she isn't even trying to. I can't make her do that. I'd love to, honestly, but she just doesn't want to put any effort into it.
she doesn't want to sell the house because it was given to her, so she doesn't have to spend any money on "rent" or other living situations. sure, she'd have a shit ton of money, but i think she's saving that for when her parents actually die and it becomes HER house. technically, the house isn't hers to sell anyways.
we don't have family photos. growing up, we weren't even a family, just people living together. it's not like she'll really give a shit when i'm gone. the only thing going through her head will be "now who will pay my bills for me? who will take care of my son?"
she isn't even my mom. she's my older roommate. trust me, she really doesn't care much about a "family" to begin with.
--
Dad
11 years ago
|
pl
Comment Hidden (
show
)
Report
0
0
I trust what you are saying is true.
Because although most say trust should be earned, I've always had the opinion trust to begin with and 'then' if any issues happen lower that trust accordingly from there.
I'm sorry you haven't felt like "family" with her. I actually feel she may think of you as 'close' family anyway, but just in her own awkward way. She may not know exactly how to express herself 'properly', but the love is there, somewhere.
ok then. Move out for a while, it may be best for both of you (actually everyone). See how it goes (in other words don't sign 12 month contracts/leases with anyone just yet. I think after a couple of weeks you'll both know what's best, and then take it from there. By the way, it may be best NOT to stop contact with her, because sometimes when we forget to call or come around the days turn into weeks, the weeks turn into months, and eventually years pass by! Just make it that you'll contact every day or two, then keep to it.
No, you don't need my ok (or anyone's, but yourself) but it sure does help when things are a bit gray. Good luck.