Is it normal that my memory gets fuzzy regarding my uncle?

55% Normal
5 Comments

My uncle has been weird my whole life, but certain memories about him are fuzzy. I feel deep down in my gut that he sexually abused me when I was young. I CAN remember that he was naked in front of me once when he babysat me, but specifics aren't there.

I asked my mom if she thought that this happened (he is my mom's sister's husband) She immediatlly started crying, and we have never talked about it again.

My aunt and uncle have adopted two kids, one boy one girl. I am scared for the little girl because he gives her alot of attention, I just don't want anything to happen to her.

Recently on FB my uncle thanked me for coming to see him in the hospital and then started posting old pics of the two of us saying aren't memories grand and that he loves me. I deleted him from my friends. I have cut all contact with him.

Is it normal that I can't remember? I know he did stuff to me but have no proof.

Is It Normal?
Help us keep this site organized and clean. Thanks!
[ Report Post ]
Comments ( 5 ) Sort: best | oldest
  • ready2rumble
    11 years ago | pl

    It is a shame that this happened to you and that your mom did not support you as she should have.

    I feel sorry for the little girl your uncle adopted, he probably will try to molest her the same way he molested you, or even worse. That man is sick and should be put behind bars.

    Comment Hidden ( show )
    Report
    1
    1
  • vicariousvulgarity
    10 years ago | pl

    First of all, I'm sorry that your mother wasn't there for you when you brought this up. That must have been awful :(

    As for your question, it is normal for people to have fuzzy memories whether or not they've been sexually abused. It is also possible for someone to create false memories on their own or based on input from other people. One of the more common ways you might notice this effect is talking with a friend about something you "did" together, only to remember that it was another friend after the person you're talking to tells you that they weren't there.

    However, none of this means that what you're remembering isn't true. Several studies have shown that only 10% of child sexual abuse allegations are false and that most of those false allegations originated from an adult (with a possible ulterior motive) rather than the alleged victim. Furthermore, there have been many court cases where repressed/recovered memories were corroborated by physical evidence. There are people who say that repressed memories are not legitimate, but clearly the facts show otherwise.

    Unfortunately this may mean that what you're remembering is entirely true, and if so then my heart goes out to you. I hope you seek help in coming to terms with what happened and I wish you the best.

    Comment Hidden ( show )
    Report
    0
    0
  • Avant-Garde
    11 years ago | pl

    There are some bits and pieces of my memories regarding relatives that are fuzzy.... It's hard to know if those are real memories or memories that my mind fabricated...

    It's terrible that your mother didn't support you on this. Is their someone that you can tell your concerns to?

    Comment Hidden ( show )
    Report
    0
    0
      -
    • Anonymous Post Author
      11 years ago | pl

      I've talked to my best friend and a therapist about it and it helps.

      Comment Hidden ( show )
      Report
      0
      0
  • Anonymous Post Author
    11 years ago | pl

    The time for him to be punished for what he did to me has come and gone. But if there is EVER proof of him hurting my cousin I will have no problem putting his butt behind bars.

    Comment Hidden ( show )
    Report
    0
    0