I don't think either of you are being "abnormal" about this. It's normal to want children, particularly when you start to approach his age group, though I must say it sounds like he's pestering you a little obsessively. If you're not comfortable with the idea at this moment (which is also totally normal considering YOUR age group) then you should make that clear to him. There's no reason for him to badger you about something that you're not ready for, and I think it's smart to wait until you are both financially stable and out of school.
He doesn't badger but he does fantasize aloud.
He doesn't ask or anything like that but he talks about it quite a bit and he understands that I am just not ready yet and even agrees that it is best to wait until we both have better jobs, but his mantra is "whenever your ready, any time".
I kind of feel bad for making him wait until he is in his thirties though. In my family, the males generally do not want children (my father did not want children) and my Mom, while not a big proponent of grandchildren ASAP (she is still in her 40's and wants me to wait until she is at least 50 before calling her Grandma), she was unusually happy about my having found a guy that wants kids.
Ah, okay. It sounded like he brought this up a lot. But either way, it's enough that you're on this site asking about it. It's good that he understands your feelings on the matter and the decision to become financially stable first - a wise choice in my opinion.
You should understand (and I get the feeling that you do) that feeling bad for making him wait and your mother's wishes shouldn't overshadow those other factors. If you're not ready emotionally and financially, then you shouldn't have a baby.
Is it normal that my husband really wants children?
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I don't think either of you are being "abnormal" about this. It's normal to want children, particularly when you start to approach his age group, though I must say it sounds like he's pestering you a little obsessively. If you're not comfortable with the idea at this moment (which is also totally normal considering YOUR age group) then you should make that clear to him. There's no reason for him to badger you about something that you're not ready for, and I think it's smart to wait until you are both financially stable and out of school.
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Anonymous Post Author
11 years ago
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He doesn't badger but he does fantasize aloud.
He doesn't ask or anything like that but he talks about it quite a bit and he understands that I am just not ready yet and even agrees that it is best to wait until we both have better jobs, but his mantra is "whenever your ready, any time".
I kind of feel bad for making him wait until he is in his thirties though. In my family, the males generally do not want children (my father did not want children) and my Mom, while not a big proponent of grandchildren ASAP (she is still in her 40's and wants me to wait until she is at least 50 before calling her Grandma), she was unusually happy about my having found a guy that wants kids.
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taciturn
11 years ago
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Ah, okay. It sounded like he brought this up a lot. But either way, it's enough that you're on this site asking about it. It's good that he understands your feelings on the matter and the decision to become financially stable first - a wise choice in my opinion.
You should understand (and I get the feeling that you do) that feeling bad for making him wait and your mother's wishes shouldn't overshadow those other factors. If you're not ready emotionally and financially, then you shouldn't have a baby.