She has a problem. Too controlling and jealous. if its not to her satisfaction she is unhappy. I would cringe at her speaking d my family in that way. So what if you're close to your brother or he confides in you or looks up to you? That should not bother her, especially when she likes the idea of her brother being your BFF. Has your brother spoken ill of her in the past, or dislikes her so she holds a personal grudge?
My brother (B1) has not spoken ill of her. If fact, B1 wanted to get close to us by when she was about to become a new member of the family. B1 suggested family (parents, B1 and another brother (B2) and family) weekend trip together to know each other better. Initially my wife went for family trips together but after a few trips she felt that B1 always wanted to get us involved and said B1 should leave us alone and why can't B1 join another B2's family without us.
B1 has been kind enough to us. 2 years ago, B1 went overseas with my parents to settle some personal matters. During that time, I had visitors and B1 said I can use his car (just few months old) since I have many people to go out with. However, I only used it for short trip and not long trip. Sometimes B1 wanted to offer help, but my wife will reject through me. But she likes to ask her brother to help me in evertything as if I cannot do it. When I offer domestic help to B1 she will not like it.
B1 lives with my parents. They all have medical conditions, very briefly: B1 - heart and vision impairment, father - heart and mobility, mother - vision impairment and mobility. Being the eldest in the family, I would like to know every now and then how B1 is coping to look after them. Looking after 2 elderly parents is difficult enough, and to make matter worse, my parents do not get along well at all due to some past history. I know that B1 spends a lot of time and energy on this and therefore would like to help whenever I can.
B1 can feel the rejection now as it is becoming more obvious. She always says that we quarreled because of B1 but I find that she has negative perception just about everything B1 does. When B1 wants to buy something he will check with B2 and me to see our view, she will say that there is no need to check at all. It is alright to make mistake and learn from mistake. My belief is if one can refer to someone's advice / experience before making a decision, why not? Then why do we have forum for people to share their thoughts / experiences / advice?
Lately, B2 asked me to help him buy a media player for my parents as the shop is near where I live. My wife said there is no hurry to do it as my parents were overseas then. She also asked why B2 could not buy it and set it up for my parents, why I had to buy it and then he set it up later.
I always treat my wife, her family, her relatives and friends very well when I visit them or when they visit us. There was one time When she was overseas and her family friends visited me, she asked me to take them out and take good care of them and I did make our guests feel very welcomed.
2 months ago, I asked her to help send B1 for a eye check since B1 cannot drive after eye check as B1 would be given eye drops that give blurred vision and will make both eyes very sensitive to sunlight for 3 or 4 hours. And she said no and why can't he take public transport or wait and drive until the vision is clear again.
Is it normal that my brother calls me?
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She has a problem. Too controlling and jealous. if its not to her satisfaction she is unhappy. I would cringe at her speaking d my family in that way. So what if you're close to your brother or he confides in you or looks up to you? That should not bother her, especially when she likes the idea of her brother being your BFF. Has your brother spoken ill of her in the past, or dislikes her so she holds a personal grudge?
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awong
11 years ago
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My brother (B1) has not spoken ill of her. If fact, B1 wanted to get close to us by when she was about to become a new member of the family. B1 suggested family (parents, B1 and another brother (B2) and family) weekend trip together to know each other better. Initially my wife went for family trips together but after a few trips she felt that B1 always wanted to get us involved and said B1 should leave us alone and why can't B1 join another B2's family without us.
B1 has been kind enough to us. 2 years ago, B1 went overseas with my parents to settle some personal matters. During that time, I had visitors and B1 said I can use his car (just few months old) since I have many people to go out with. However, I only used it for short trip and not long trip. Sometimes B1 wanted to offer help, but my wife will reject through me. But she likes to ask her brother to help me in evertything as if I cannot do it. When I offer domestic help to B1 she will not like it.
B1 lives with my parents. They all have medical conditions, very briefly: B1 - heart and vision impairment, father - heart and mobility, mother - vision impairment and mobility. Being the eldest in the family, I would like to know every now and then how B1 is coping to look after them. Looking after 2 elderly parents is difficult enough, and to make matter worse, my parents do not get along well at all due to some past history. I know that B1 spends a lot of time and energy on this and therefore would like to help whenever I can.
B1 can feel the rejection now as it is becoming more obvious. She always says that we quarreled because of B1 but I find that she has negative perception just about everything B1 does. When B1 wants to buy something he will check with B2 and me to see our view, she will say that there is no need to check at all. It is alright to make mistake and learn from mistake. My belief is if one can refer to someone's advice / experience before making a decision, why not? Then why do we have forum for people to share their thoughts / experiences / advice?
Lately, B2 asked me to help him buy a media player for my parents as the shop is near where I live. My wife said there is no hurry to do it as my parents were overseas then. She also asked why B2 could not buy it and set it up for my parents, why I had to buy it and then he set it up later.
I always treat my wife, her family, her relatives and friends very well when I visit them or when they visit us. There was one time When she was overseas and her family friends visited me, she asked me to take them out and take good care of them and I did make our guests feel very welcomed.
2 months ago, I asked her to help send B1 for a eye check since B1 cannot drive after eye check as B1 would be given eye drops that give blurred vision and will make both eyes very sensitive to sunlight for 3 or 4 hours. And she said no and why can't he take public transport or wait and drive until the vision is clear again.