You have to make it clear to him that the relationship consists of 2 people, him and you. Everyone has special needs that need to be met which varies with everyone. Now, if he loves you as much as you love him (and you seem to love him a lot which is great) but he needs to COMPROMISE. That is the key key element there. Apart from truts and love. If you love someone you have to compromise, why? If you don'tcompromise then im sorry there is no love there. Sometimes people do things out of their comfort zone to make their other partner happy.
I would talk to him if i were you, you need to tell him that his lack of affection ( but i see it more as being lazy) is causing you distress. If you dont have communication you dont have anything. If he turns aroud to you and says, 'well this is how i am'.. Yes he was like that when you met him, when he was single, now he has you and you have needs and what you are asking is NOTHING compared to other women.
If he does not budge then, if i were you, i would STOP doing all those things. Because the more you keep doing all these things and the more you try = the more you would want it reciprocated it back.
Have a word with him, see what he says and if he refuses to change, STOP doing everything you do and see if his reaction will change to that. It may be that he has gotten so use to you doing everything that he does not see the necessity to do it back. Trust me, i know from experience. When you give them everything and do everything they will get in that comfort zone and do NOTHING in return because they dont have too since you are doing everything.
Thank you for your advice, you made a lot of good points. He is willing to compromise on lots of things like retirement funds, where we are going to live, etc. But this one subject seems to be very touchy with him. He gets upset and thinks I see him as a bad boyfriend, when in fact I'm asking for just a little affection. Like cuddling and so on. But I'm just going to focus on the things he does do for me. Thanks again.
Is It Normal That My Boyfriend Treats Me Like This?
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You have to make it clear to him that the relationship consists of 2 people, him and you. Everyone has special needs that need to be met which varies with everyone. Now, if he loves you as much as you love him (and you seem to love him a lot which is great) but he needs to COMPROMISE. That is the key key element there. Apart from truts and love. If you love someone you have to compromise, why? If you don'tcompromise then im sorry there is no love there. Sometimes people do things out of their comfort zone to make their other partner happy.
I would talk to him if i were you, you need to tell him that his lack of affection ( but i see it more as being lazy) is causing you distress. If you dont have communication you dont have anything. If he turns aroud to you and says, 'well this is how i am'.. Yes he was like that when you met him, when he was single, now he has you and you have needs and what you are asking is NOTHING compared to other women.
If he does not budge then, if i were you, i would STOP doing all those things. Because the more you keep doing all these things and the more you try = the more you would want it reciprocated it back.
Have a word with him, see what he says and if he refuses to change, STOP doing everything you do and see if his reaction will change to that. It may be that he has gotten so use to you doing everything that he does not see the necessity to do it back. Trust me, i know from experience. When you give them everything and do everything they will get in that comfort zone and do NOTHING in return because they dont have too since you are doing everything.
good luck
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Thank you for your advice, you made a lot of good points. He is willing to compromise on lots of things like retirement funds, where we are going to live, etc. But this one subject seems to be very touchy with him. He gets upset and thinks I see him as a bad boyfriend, when in fact I'm asking for just a little affection. Like cuddling and so on. But I'm just going to focus on the things he does do for me. Thanks again.