Pumpkin, what she did was extremely wrong, she knew what she was doing! If I met her I would've beaten the living shit out of her! I would've kicked my foot so far up her ass, that it would've been coming out of her mouth and then I would've ripped it out her mouth!!!!
You've got my support! What do the friends you have told this to think? Have you confronted this disgrace of a human being? I really think it would be best if you saw a Psychologist. A good one, one that will listen to your needs and calm the fears of your heart. Good Luck:')
I don't really understand the aggression... I mean, yeah almost 2 decades ago a young woman made a mistake. I can't even remember her name, let alone "confront" her. I guess it was "wrong" but I still don't feel abused. I don't know why. I'm not afraid of what happened, I just... don't really know what to make of it all.
For some reason I can't just make myself think "I was sexually molested & abused, and am angry about it!" Everyone keeps saying see a psychologist. I really dislike the idea! I don't think I'm mentally sick? It is kind of you to offer support of course, but I don't know what action to take.
My friends have mostly told me yeah, it's weird... and asked me questions. "How does it make you feel?" and all that stuff. A few have also told me I was abused. A greater number have said it's "hot" and that the idea aroused them. Honestly, nothing all that useful.
I'm not saying it wasn't wrong, and one should never simply roll over and accept abuse, no matter what form it takes. That being said, the OP says she's "much older", and while it's good to realize what happened for what it was - abuse, I think she's making a good choice in not getting mired in anger, shame, a need for vengeance, etc.
What's important is to try and reconcile the situation in your mind and repair what damage has been done by confronting it, learning and growing from the overall experience. A psychologist or therapist would be a very smart move, as they have extensive training in how to help you do this.
IIN that my babysitter was my first sexual encounter? (both female)
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Pumpkin, what she did was extremely wrong, she knew what she was doing! If I met her I would've beaten the living shit out of her! I would've kicked my foot so far up her ass, that it would've been coming out of her mouth and then I would've ripped it out her mouth!!!!
You've got my support! What do the friends you have told this to think? Have you confronted this disgrace of a human being? I really think it would be best if you saw a Psychologist. A good one, one that will listen to your needs and calm the fears of your heart. Good Luck:')
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PumpkinKate
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I don't really understand the aggression... I mean, yeah almost 2 decades ago a young woman made a mistake. I can't even remember her name, let alone "confront" her. I guess it was "wrong" but I still don't feel abused. I don't know why. I'm not afraid of what happened, I just... don't really know what to make of it all.
For some reason I can't just make myself think "I was sexually molested & abused, and am angry about it!" Everyone keeps saying see a psychologist. I really dislike the idea! I don't think I'm mentally sick? It is kind of you to offer support of course, but I don't know what action to take.
My friends have mostly told me yeah, it's weird... and asked me questions. "How does it make you feel?" and all that stuff. A few have also told me I was abused. A greater number have said it's "hot" and that the idea aroused them. Honestly, nothing all that useful.
I'm not saying it wasn't wrong, and one should never simply roll over and accept abuse, no matter what form it takes. That being said, the OP says she's "much older", and while it's good to realize what happened for what it was - abuse, I think she's making a good choice in not getting mired in anger, shame, a need for vengeance, etc.
What's important is to try and reconcile the situation in your mind and repair what damage has been done by confronting it, learning and growing from the overall experience. A psychologist or therapist would be a very smart move, as they have extensive training in how to help you do this.