Is it normal that in have no real connection to anyone?(alone)

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2 Comments

About me: I'm a 25 yr old woman.

I grew up in a very volitile family. My dad has been gone for three years now. He was diagnosed with stage four colon cancer. He was my only real connection i've ever had. My parents divorced while he was in hospice care. He said he did'nt want to die married to her. She did not want to take care of him while he was sick. Once my dad passed everyone seemed to disappear from my life. My uncle,aunt,cousins,mother. No one ever calls me.
It's not from a lack of trying on my part. I used to call them and try to set up lunches or dinners, and no one ever has time. The worst thing is when i text them or something they always say," sorry I haven't forgotten you Ive just been busy."(They say this unpromted) For three years they've been busy! Ive had no real or lasting friendships ever. It seems everyone drifts away. Ive never felt connected to anyone realy. Even at work I feel alienated. I feel like i'm not worthy of anyone. People at work make fun of me so much, and look at me like I am an alien(just like school all over agian).I've never had a boyfriend or a real friend at all.I'm just lost. Is anyone else like this.

Is It Normal?
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  • watashikara
    9 years ago | pl

    I say normal because I had a very similar issue but have made some strides since then. People are probably used to you being dull or more soft spoken than you like. I mean no disrespect but from my experience, if you haven't had good relationships you probably don't know what it takes to start them. I got to the point where I was just too depressed to care about people and forgot how to start conversations and stay engaging. I know you are trying and that is great but you need to know exactly HOW to try. You have recognized the issue and that is at times the hardest part. Try this. Find something you are interested in, go to social gatherings/ events accordingly and try to genuinley start a conversation with many people. Hopefully you find yourself someone who interests you and try to make it a point to put in as much as you can into the relationship to keep the fire going. Try not to ever be sad around people and speak with full volume when talking. People like people who make them feel comfortable. We all inherently avoid people who do otherwise. Best of luck to you in the future!

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  • 123Random
    9 years ago | pl

    I used to be like this for a few years, but I don't think its normal for it to last this long. Getting out and doing more activities outside of work and home really turned me around, and it might help you too assuming you aren't already doing that.

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