I was molested by my brother as a boy. It's not desireable. I was made to believe it never happened because he said he would kill me. At family gatherings as a kid, I would blurt out "(insert name) put his thing in my butt". I was outed a as the goofy kid who would do anything for laughs. Growing up I was very quiet and innocent. He took that from me. I lived most of my youth as a comedian unknowingly constantly crying for help. Of course it wasn't all just horrible nonstop, but now as I'm older I see a lot of things. You start to remember the years that you had worked to move past. I have OCD that keeps me a little occupied and I live small. Small apartment, usually in one room. You don't want to be molested. While i think it's all tought me to appreciate good things, enjoy having a normal life.
As I've said to others on this post. I realize it would be awful if it ACTUALLY happened. I'm just asking if I'm alone in thinking this way.
However I am so terribly sorry this happened to you. You didn't deserve that. God bless you.
I am not condemning you fyi. I think people want to feel real. How we are raised has a big influence on us. Sounds like to some extent you want a real reason to break free from the mold of life and it's expectations
IIN that I wish I had been sexually abused as a child?
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I was molested by my brother as a boy. It's not desireable. I was made to believe it never happened because he said he would kill me. At family gatherings as a kid, I would blurt out "(insert name) put his thing in my butt". I was outed a as the goofy kid who would do anything for laughs. Growing up I was very quiet and innocent. He took that from me. I lived most of my youth as a comedian unknowingly constantly crying for help. Of course it wasn't all just horrible nonstop, but now as I'm older I see a lot of things. You start to remember the years that you had worked to move past. I have OCD that keeps me a little occupied and I live small. Small apartment, usually in one room. You don't want to be molested. While i think it's all tought me to appreciate good things, enjoy having a normal life.
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SolarPriestess
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As I've said to others on this post. I realize it would be awful if it ACTUALLY happened. I'm just asking if I'm alone in thinking this way.
However I am so terribly sorry this happened to you. You didn't deserve that. God bless you.
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MikeN
5 years ago
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LionsMane
5 years ago
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God?
I am not condemning you fyi. I think people want to feel real. How we are raised has a big influence on us. Sounds like to some extent you want a real reason to break free from the mold of life and it's expectations