Is it normal that i want to marry a woman when i've been with men

66% Normal
7 Comments

For the last ten years i've secretly dated and had sex with men. Now as I'm approaching thirty, I want to marry a woman and have a family. I did a benfit analysis and I've come to the conclusion the gay life style is too expensive socially and emotionally. In recent years 4 friends of mine have been diagnosed with HIV. My gay friends that are proffesionals (physicians) are ostracized in the work place. Not to mention there is endless contempt from family members because of their lifestyle choice. Also, it seems that gay men can retire from the social scene at age 40, because gay men are usually interested in younger attractive men. One of my friends argues that I should be myself and just live. But to me being gay is like living in bondage. And gay life coupled with the fact that I'm a black american trying to be sucessful in a non-progressive southern population, is too much stress....is my reasoning normal?????

Voting Results
66% Normal
Based on 102 votes (67 yes)
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Comments ( 7 )
  • taylort
    13 years ago

    Yes it's normal but I think most gay people would agree that being gay is not a choice. It's understandable that you want to have the "picture perfect family" that everyone dreams of and that the media portrays, but that mold does not fit every person. Instead of thinking logically you need to think emotionally. Could you be happy with a wife? Would she be able to fulfil your every need? If not, there's no reason to hide behind the facade. It is about quality of life, please don't only think of all the negative things you will have to endure, but rather the positive things you will gain by spending your life with your soul mate! If you find your soul mate in a woman, then fine, but if it is a man, don't be afraid of that! We are coming into a much more accepting time. I know it's a hard life, but it was way harder for the people who did it before you and I am willing to bet that most of them do not regret being who they are. Nothing is harder than trying to force fit yourself into this idea of perfection that society has! Live a happy life and do the things that make YOU happy, cause at the end of it all, you die alone! :) good luck!

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  • randypete
    13 years ago

    good luck

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  • I'd-rather-not-say
    13 years ago

    U could find a husband I guess hopefully one without std's but if u really emotionaly want a wife then go for it

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  • SanDEstevez
    12 years ago

    You, dear sir, are a shit

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  • ferro
    13 years ago

    Thanks for your feedback.

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  • [Old Memory]
    13 years ago

    ^

    What they said. Don't let yourself be taken in by the perfect family image, no family is perfect and you should only do what makes you happy.

    But just because you're gay doesn't mean you have to fit into a scene or act a certain way and if other people don't like what you do, either disregard them for a while or you could move to a place more accepting.

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  • 343Boy
    13 years ago

    So why exactly did you choose to be gay?

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