Ahh, no, I did actually see three or four of the first series. The name is a bit unfortunate but the show was quite good. There was nothing I could pick out as insensitive and I do hope it was made for the good reason I mention. It was only a nagging doubt rather than anything substantial. It may be that perhaps even the good and the bad reasons I mentioned are both in play but the net effect is positive and that people see disability as something that should be considered for what it is.
In some ways, I can't blame people, though. They go off their first instincts. I can imagine people looking at you and thinking, "Aww, pretty girl in a wheelchair. Isn't that sad?" Which is wrong for multiple reasons. What I imagine they'd be better thinking is, "There's a person who has been using a wheelchair for an indeterminate time and most likely has a health issue which necessitates it. She's probably very used to this and less so than me so how can I not inconvenience her or make it seem 'different' when it's her everyday reality and, actually, also mine too because it's pretty common for people to have disabilities".
I don't know about the "pretty" part, but I think they do think that I'm young and tragic. I don't know. People usually don't really look at me, like they're trying so hard not to stare that I turn invisible. When they do, they do this sad little smile like I'm an injured puppy and immediately avert their eyes. It's not a big thing, but it can be uncomfortable. I get that a lot in the grocery store for some reason, and sometimes I just want to say "Relax your face meat, you silly fuck. I'm just doing my shopping."
There are some people who are really nice and appropriate, and that helps a lot. I'm not angry or sad all the time because of the people who don't handle it well, but it wears me down.
IIN that I think these compliments to the disabled are patronising?
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Given that it's called "The Undateables", I wouldn't get my hopes up.
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dappled
10 years ago
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Ahh, no, I did actually see three or four of the first series. The name is a bit unfortunate but the show was quite good. There was nothing I could pick out as insensitive and I do hope it was made for the good reason I mention. It was only a nagging doubt rather than anything substantial. It may be that perhaps even the good and the bad reasons I mentioned are both in play but the net effect is positive and that people see disability as something that should be considered for what it is.
In some ways, I can't blame people, though. They go off their first instincts. I can imagine people looking at you and thinking, "Aww, pretty girl in a wheelchair. Isn't that sad?" Which is wrong for multiple reasons. What I imagine they'd be better thinking is, "There's a person who has been using a wheelchair for an indeterminate time and most likely has a health issue which necessitates it. She's probably very used to this and less so than me so how can I not inconvenience her or make it seem 'different' when it's her everyday reality and, actually, also mine too because it's pretty common for people to have disabilities".
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VioletTrees
10 years ago
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I don't know about the "pretty" part, but I think they do think that I'm young and tragic. I don't know. People usually don't really look at me, like they're trying so hard not to stare that I turn invisible. When they do, they do this sad little smile like I'm an injured puppy and immediately avert their eyes. It's not a big thing, but it can be uncomfortable. I get that a lot in the grocery store for some reason, and sometimes I just want to say "Relax your face meat, you silly fuck. I'm just doing my shopping."
There are some people who are really nice and appropriate, and that helps a lot. I'm not angry or sad all the time because of the people who don't handle it well, but it wears me down.