Don't pretend, man. You'll just be even more unhappy with yourself. Be attracted to who you are attracted to, and like the things that you like. You're living for those around you right now, but you need to live for yourself. I don't know how old you are, but when I was in high school, I felt like I needed to change to fit in. So I did. I completely despise who I was in high school now, because it ruined great relationships with my family, friends, and boyfriends. It's easier out of high school. In the mean time, try to figure out who you are for yourself. What did Dr. Seuss say? Be who you are and say how you feel, because those who mind don't matter, and those who matter don't mind.
Is it normal that I think I would've been better off as a guy?
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Don't pretend, man. You'll just be even more unhappy with yourself. Be attracted to who you are attracted to, and like the things that you like. You're living for those around you right now, but you need to live for yourself. I don't know how old you are, but when I was in high school, I felt like I needed to change to fit in. So I did. I completely despise who I was in high school now, because it ruined great relationships with my family, friends, and boyfriends. It's easier out of high school. In the mean time, try to figure out who you are for yourself. What did Dr. Seuss say? Be who you are and say how you feel, because those who mind don't matter, and those who matter don't mind.