Did something happen in his life around the time that he started calling you ungrateful? I have seen other dads not transition well from little kid to teenager regarding their daughters. It could even be something from his own childhood that you wouldn't know about. If he had some kind of traumatic or hurtful experience around that age seeing you at that age may have stirred something up that he couldn't deal with at that time. Does he relate well with women in general? If he is awkward around women it is possible it could be related to you becoming one. I am really sorry that he makes you feel so unloved, that is really hurtful.
I think that you are absolutely right! Her dad obviously loved the 'little girl' stage but didn't enjoy the rebellious teenage stage.
I have to admit I'm going through something very similar with my son. He doesn't party, smoke, drink, drugs - or do anything bad but I just expect him to be able to get on with what he has to do. I even think it may simply be coz he's taller than me now.
I know that I have to be very careful coz (like her dad) if I don't soften to consciously overcome it, I will 'switch off' expecting the teenager to suddenly be an adult - able to cope emotionally with an adult brain able to shrug things off.
Dear OP - I think your dad is exhausted with the responsibility of raising you and needs a break. The only way I can explain this to you is, as if you are a clingy girlfriend who won't let him have any space. You have no idea how demanding children are.
Think about it ... Would you go out to work and hand in all your wages to buy your dad a phone, clothes, food, luxuries, leisure, luxuries, etc? Anything that you hope would make him happy? Then he goes through a couple of years (puberty) where nothing you can do is right?!
I'm drained even thinking about teenagers - would he like to run away with me ;o)
We are all selfish, just think about how children take take take.
I'm just trying to explain it from a parent's point of view. You don't need to take offense! As Dad said, give the poor man a hug - and I guarantee he will lighten up a bit.
Show some appreciation by making dinner, or even by lifting your clothes off the floor.
You will understand better when you have a child of your own, then you will look back and laugh.
Is it normal that I never want to be around my own Father?
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Did something happen in his life around the time that he started calling you ungrateful? I have seen other dads not transition well from little kid to teenager regarding their daughters. It could even be something from his own childhood that you wouldn't know about. If he had some kind of traumatic or hurtful experience around that age seeing you at that age may have stirred something up that he couldn't deal with at that time. Does he relate well with women in general? If he is awkward around women it is possible it could be related to you becoming one. I am really sorry that he makes you feel so unloved, that is really hurtful.
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joybird
11 years ago
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I think that you are absolutely right! Her dad obviously loved the 'little girl' stage but didn't enjoy the rebellious teenage stage.
I have to admit I'm going through something very similar with my son. He doesn't party, smoke, drink, drugs - or do anything bad but I just expect him to be able to get on with what he has to do. I even think it may simply be coz he's taller than me now.
I know that I have to be very careful coz (like her dad) if I don't soften to consciously overcome it, I will 'switch off' expecting the teenager to suddenly be an adult - able to cope emotionally with an adult brain able to shrug things off.
Dear OP - I think your dad is exhausted with the responsibility of raising you and needs a break. The only way I can explain this to you is, as if you are a clingy girlfriend who won't let him have any space. You have no idea how demanding children are.
Think about it ... Would you go out to work and hand in all your wages to buy your dad a phone, clothes, food, luxuries, leisure, luxuries, etc? Anything that you hope would make him happy? Then he goes through a couple of years (puberty) where nothing you can do is right?!
I'm drained even thinking about teenagers - would he like to run away with me ;o)
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GaelicPride26
11 years ago
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So I am selfish. Well...thanks. I'm very glad I wont have to exhaust my father for much longer.
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joybird
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We are all selfish, just think about how children take take take.
I'm just trying to explain it from a parent's point of view. You don't need to take offense! As Dad said, give the poor man a hug - and I guarantee he will lighten up a bit.
Show some appreciation by making dinner, or even by lifting your clothes off the floor.
You will understand better when you have a child of your own, then you will look back and laugh.
Good luck!