Yeah, there is something wrong. They are using you.
They are getting you stoned and pretending like they are doing something to make your life any better.
You lack the necessary social skills to fit in with popular guys your age,so you'd rather hang out with older people who act sligthly protective, people you can see as "guides". As role models. Who pretend to ignore the flaws people your same age are avoiding for. You like hanging out with supportive encouraging older people rather than competing kids your age, who would not be as understanding, or pretentiously friendly. Your mum wants you to go hoping spending some time with these guys will eventually turn into a social addiction, so you probably will learn how to interact and start going out on your own more often to do something different from seeking drugs. Drugs become the main motivator. The only thing you go out for, you probably Would not even like hanging out with them if they did not get you stoned. You basically got locked in a rejection/acceptance loop. Meaning: you go out, look around, see the usual people you already see as somebody you would not like hanging out with, and the feeling in kind of mutual. So all other guys with the same problem become your only resort. But being all a bunch of rejects doesn't necesserily mean you are gonna enjoy each other company. They drag you down because they all talk about is their own problems, and there is no actual possibility of cooperating to solve them all. So everyone does what comes to mind to deal with their own problems. So you end up feeling awkward because you are never the main subject. The main worry. A priority. You do not feel important to them. So you feel 'dragged down'. This also happens because of the social struggle kids get locked in to assign themselves the roles they are gonna play later. You do not like the role that's being automatically assigned to you, so you just go: fuck them.
Also: older means to you: more reliable. And blah blah.
In the end you always find yourself alone in your room feeling forsaken and stuff simply because nobody actually sticks with you long enough. They all got more important businesses and activities to attend to. I'd ask you some questions to go deeper in this trouble of yours but then again it would not be of any use since it wouldn't make anything that matters happen in your life.
Is it normal that I nearly always want to be alone?
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Yeah, there is something wrong. They are using you.
They are getting you stoned and pretending like they are doing something to make your life any better.
You lack the necessary social skills to fit in with popular guys your age,so you'd rather hang out with older people who act sligthly protective, people you can see as "guides". As role models. Who pretend to ignore the flaws people your same age are avoiding for. You like hanging out with supportive encouraging older people rather than competing kids your age, who would not be as understanding, or pretentiously friendly. Your mum wants you to go hoping spending some time with these guys will eventually turn into a social addiction, so you probably will learn how to interact and start going out on your own more often to do something different from seeking drugs. Drugs become the main motivator. The only thing you go out for, you probably Would not even like hanging out with them if they did not get you stoned. You basically got locked in a rejection/acceptance loop. Meaning: you go out, look around, see the usual people you already see as somebody you would not like hanging out with, and the feeling in kind of mutual. So all other guys with the same problem become your only resort. But being all a bunch of rejects doesn't necesserily mean you are gonna enjoy each other company. They drag you down because they all talk about is their own problems, and there is no actual possibility of cooperating to solve them all. So everyone does what comes to mind to deal with their own problems. So you end up feeling awkward because you are never the main subject. The main worry. A priority. You do not feel important to them. So you feel 'dragged down'. This also happens because of the social struggle kids get locked in to assign themselves the roles they are gonna play later. You do not like the role that's being automatically assigned to you, so you just go: fuck them.
Also: older means to you: more reliable. And blah blah.
In the end you always find yourself alone in your room feeling forsaken and stuff simply because nobody actually sticks with you long enough. They all got more important businesses and activities to attend to. I'd ask you some questions to go deeper in this trouble of yours but then again it would not be of any use since it wouldn't make anything that matters happen in your life.