I have had the same experience and for years couldn't get there with a partner. I used to fake it all the time. It was only once I worked on my sexual issues that were left over from some pretty bad shit I went through that I got over the problem. There is also possibly a medical reason why you can't get there easily, but I think it's probably more psychological. Maybe you are afraid to relax and just let go. I used to be secretly afraid that my partner would laugh at me while in the throes, and sometimes after getting there, I still have that fear. Maybe you should go and see a sex therapist or a gynie and ask about this, but I know it's not that uncommon. I too have to tense my body to make it over the edge and sometimes, tensing up ruins it altogether. It's come down to mastering the 'science' just to get there and I often sit and wonder if it's even worth it anymore.
Is it normal that i have to completely tense my body to orgasm?!
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I have had the same experience and for years couldn't get there with a partner. I used to fake it all the time. It was only once I worked on my sexual issues that were left over from some pretty bad shit I went through that I got over the problem. There is also possibly a medical reason why you can't get there easily, but I think it's probably more psychological. Maybe you are afraid to relax and just let go. I used to be secretly afraid that my partner would laugh at me while in the throes, and sometimes after getting there, I still have that fear. Maybe you should go and see a sex therapist or a gynie and ask about this, but I know it's not that uncommon. I too have to tense my body to make it over the edge and sometimes, tensing up ruins it altogether. It's come down to mastering the 'science' just to get there and I often sit and wonder if it's even worth it anymore.