But this sounds like a very tough place to be. I do hope that you are able to forgive yourself or at least attempt to, and love yourself to get the support structure that you deserve. This is a post that helped me a lot when I was low https://www.reddit.com/r/NonZeroDay/comments/1qbxvz/the_gospel_of_uryans01_helpful_advice_for_anyone/
I actually found it in the No Fap subreddit when dealing with my own masturbation addiction.
I actually didn't think it was able to provide me with the means to break the habit, but it does have a very useful simple way of looking at things that helped me, it may not click with you but just thought I'd include it.
Is it normal that I have a desire to be castrated and nullified
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But this sounds like a very tough place to be. I do hope that you are able to forgive yourself or at least attempt to, and love yourself to get the support structure that you deserve. This is a post that helped me a lot when I was low https://www.reddit.com/r/NonZeroDay/comments/1qbxvz/the_gospel_of_uryans01_helpful_advice_for_anyone/
I actually found it in the No Fap subreddit when dealing with my own masturbation addiction.
I actually didn't think it was able to provide me with the means to break the habit, but it does have a very useful simple way of looking at things that helped me, it may not click with you but just thought I'd include it.