Is it normal that i hate my parents even though they are not abusive?

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5 Comments

I hate my parents but they are not abusive or anything. They just don’t care about me. On top of that, my parents (my dad mostly) and my sister always fight too. It is sometimes over small matter and I always thought that it was something wrong with my sister but recently I’ve been having some doubts. I hate my parents (my dad and my stepmom, ) but they are not abusive or mean in any way. They barely hit me (but they have so far) and they feed me and cloth me. But I have a feeling that they think they are good parents just because they do just that. On a typical day, they send me too school, pick me up again and when they got home from work, they give me the food they buy from the take-out. They never bothered about whether I want to go out, or what I want to eat, or what I want to do. I barely get to see my friends outside school anymore because we live so far away from my school (because my dad needs to be nearer to his job and he doesn’t want to wake up at 6.30 anymore when we lived nearer to the school, ah how ‘unselfish’). And when I get upset about not getting to go out ONCE IN A WHILE, they will lecture to me about how ungrateful I am or how I need to be more thankful because AT LEAST I get too eat, and have a house. And yeah, I think I should because that’s ALL I HAVE. They’re always so busy now that they couldn’t give a sh*t about me or my sister. My stepmother’s mom has cancer now and she’s always busy and she drags my father around when she needs to check up on her mother or buy her stupid fertilizers. And me and my sister now are laughing at him because he was so desperate to get married after one year my mother now. He was always bragging about if he gets married, there would be someone to look after us, cook dinner and so forth. And I actually thought, “Wow, it must be really nice to have a mother once again since I have not had any ever since my real mom had cancer. I think dad should definitely get married!” But now, all I can think is, “DAD! ARE YOU FUCKING SERIOUS! THIS WOMAN DOESN’T EVEN DO ANYTHING!! ALL SHE DOES IS GO TO THE HOSPITAL AND BUY F*CKING FERTILIZERS! AND SHE DRIVES US TO SCHOOL, JUST BECAUSE YOU CAN’T BE BOTHERED TO! SHE DOESN’T EVEN TALK TO US!” And my dad thinks that I need to be all grateful to her JUST BECAUSE SHE DRIVES ME TO SCHOOL EVERDAY! And he still thinks I need to be worshipping him just because he bought me a shitty dinner for the past 4 years and that’s it.

Seriously, can someone please tell me that it takes more than just food and some money to be a good parent?

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Comments ( 5 ) Sort: best | oldest
  • crissyabear
    12 years ago | pl

    They have lives too. You are complaining because your step mom is so preoccupied with her dying mother that she can drive you to see your friends. I'm sure they are also busy working to provide you with the things you need? Have some compassion for your stepmom. You should know what she is going through since you went through it yourself. You sound selfish and entitled. Try to see things from someone else's point of view.

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  • [Old Memory]
    12 years ago | pl

    Of course it takes more than that. I'm not really liking my father at the moment as I'm realizing what an unsupportive, selfish, stupid dick he can be. He does the same thing your parents do: tells me I should be happy I eat and blah blah. What the fuck...thats what you're supposed to do if you call yourself a parent. I always tell him its more to it than that but he doesn't really listen. We (me, my mom and him) usually get into huge arguments every year that will leave us not talking for months. Good thing my mom isn't like that though.

    Anywho I understand you because parents are meant to be there for you physically but mostly emotionally; they are there to teach/advise you, and support you. You don't have to be physically abusive to be a bad parent. You can never land on finger on your kid but if you're not really providing the mental/emotional support then that's pretty much neglect in my eyes.

    Don't get me wrong though it could be A LOT worse and you (even I) should be happy they provide us with some basic necessities as they don't have to do it. My thing is though..I'm not going to thank you every time you buy dinner for me to eat or pay the bills because if you consider yourself a true parent then thats part of your role anyway.

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  • realllyfrustrated
    12 years ago | pl

    My parents are kind of like that, though we have moments where we really are happy and feel like we agree on everything. My parents are dicks though. They always say I do stuff and blame me for shit, and god forbid I stick up for myself. And they use that excuse. "Be happy you eat every night". And they say: "When I was a kid I got beat with belts." HIT ME THEN. I'll leave this house and be sad for the rest of my life. I hate when parents act like they're so much better than the generation before them, when in some aspect, they're much much worse.

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  • joybird
    12 years ago | pl

    Suck it up until you can move out!!

    Would you spend your hard-earned money on them? Would you feed them, drive them about, pay their utilities, let them live with you and your partner, etc?

    No, I didn't think so!!

    If it really bothers you, ask them to put you into care.

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  • Idontpulloutmycouchdoes
    11 years ago | pl

    You definitely need to put yourself in their shoes. They probably have so much shit going on in their lives and what, you just sit in a classroom all day as your only responsibility? Not to sound like a dick, but your stepmoms mother is severely ill and your complaining bc shes tending to her and not doing things for you who shes not even blood related to you? Idk man

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