Is it normal that I hate my gf's kid?

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  • Ok, first, some advice NEVER, EVER be alone with the child you dislike. Just in case you have a momentary lapse of reason and decide to smack him one.
    There could be many reasons you dislike him. Maybe if you take a piece of paper and write down everything you don't like on one side and anything you do like (maybe nothing) on the other side. Then, try to go deeper into your feelings on WHY you dislike that particular thing about the child. If you break the hate up into little chunks, sometimes its easier to find reasons for the dislike.
    Some suggestions as to why you might not like him 1) He looks like his dad (presumably the ex of your current partner) 2) You think he is mocking you, hates you, resents your relationship with his mum. 3)You think he is demon possessed kind of like on The Exorcist 4) You resent him because his mum gives him lots of cuddles and attention...attention YOU might otherwise get. 5) He is always talking about his dad, how much he loves him, how good he is...which threatens you and your position with his mum 6) He is a reminder of his mum's relationship with her ex.... You get the point...
    I'm sure if you look at things carefully, you will be able to work out where the resentment is coming from. Once you work that out...try and deal with it by using Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (look it up online) or maybe Thought Stopping. Also, do positive stuff with the boy but NEVER alone. Stuff you like doing. Find things you have in common, Teach him stuff, fishing, skateboarding, whateva. Be honest with the boy's mum, let her know you are trying to sort out where these feelings come from. That said, the number one reason men seem to resent small children is that THEY want to be looked after and the small child takes mommies attention away. On the bright side, this is something you can deal with.

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