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I'm a girl, and if a guy takes a liking to me and starts acting nice to me and pulling moves (not exactly sexual, just like giving me flowers or something) I feel grossed and creeped out. Even if I like the person, or think I do, they do something affectionate and I get freaked out.
Yeah I'm actually kind of the same too.
I sometimes feel that way when my good friends give me gifts even, especially if I didn't get them anything. I always see it as needing to be even; if someone gives me something then I need to get them something to even it out. This is only to my good friends and family though, which its give and take. But I still do feel awkward like I don't deserve it in a way.
Nothing wrong with not wanting people to do nice things for you. I dont like it either, but I tend to be very suspicious of it.
Why are they doing something like that for me after all?
why do you get freaked out? I dated a girl like that. she was molested as a child. she got over it eventually after 6 months or so of just cuddling. I suppose getting comfortable with me physically. she eventually became abusive though and started hitting me and i had to dump her so it was all for nothing i guess.
Is their any real reason? Anyway, it was dumb fights about bills most of the time. I guess I was really being stubborn with her but I felt I had to be at the time. Now I just chalk up the whole experience to my inexperience with people like her and relationships in general. I wasn't going to hit her back so i just dumped her and moved on. she owed me a ton of money too. I was able to get a fraction of it back but when she started shit again I had to let it go as crazy bitch tax. fun times. Im sure OP isn't like this.
glad i'm not the only one, i get freaked out when i see certain people stare at me and squinting at the same time.
It may have something to do with something that happened when you were younger
There's always a reason for everything someone does. The question becomes, are you ok with the reason?
Sometimes, if someone does something out of the norm, then maybe wonder what the real reason is.
But, if you are suspicious of EVERY time someone does something nice for you, maybe you should think about why are you THAT suspicious
It's not at all that I'm suspicious. The way I understand it, you think that I feel like they're up to something if they do something nice to me. If I'm wrong correct me haha. But no I just feel like my stomach gets tight, it's that feeling where someone is too clingy and you feel uncomfortable.
I'm kind of like the same. In highschool I had a few girls hug me alot, grab my arm and hold it while walking next to me. I kept moving my arm away or just give the "Erm, no" look. Regardless, they didn't stop.
It made me feel awkward, I didn't, and still don't get the whole point of their actions, even if they "liked me" I don't see how holding my arm shows that.
My mother randomly gets very parentaly loving at random times, and she will hug me and be nice, in that way you can tell she's faking her kindness because she wants to be nice that day. So that always made me feel awkward.
Sounds like you're not used to people doing nice things for you just for the sake of doing nice things for you.
It's the same for me, as a kid, my parents always had an ulterior motive for what they did for me, they even trivialized things such as food and shelter as "favors" that they did for me.
Hmm to each their own. Flowers do give a creepy vibe. But i guess a lot of different tactics would be too. I haves no idea how to answer this. Sorry for wasting your time.
That's happened to me too! It sucks cause you think you like them but then you feel uncomfortable and don't know why :(