If you can, you might benefit from taking a step back when you get angry and reassessing the situation. Most importantly, you must breathe! Take a minute to think it over from every angle (while breathing) - the person who you are angry with, why you are angry with them, and if it is actually worth the energy of your anger. Not every person is out to hurt you! It's also quite important that you surround yourself with people who generally care for your well being. You already know you are naturally defensive in those kinds of situations you mentioned - and that's really excellent, a good start! Now you've just got to retrain yourself to take a minute and really think things through before you say/do something you might regret by lashing out in anger. It's not easy, because it's now a reflex to you....but I think you can overcome this. :)
Thank u :) Comments like this fill me with hope! haha. I'll try to improve my mood and control my anger... I kinda had given up, but I'll give it another try. Thank you for the feedback, feels good to have such nice internet company!
Not a problem! You may not succeed at first, but do try, try again! Even in one on one conversation - even if you don't feel you have the time to think your response through - make an effort and call a time out. Say to the person, "we will resume this conversation in five minutes after I step outside for some air". Even if you feel rushed, just remember that those 5 minutes could be the difference between an outrageous response and something a bit more composed (which in the end will lead to a more positive experience). I'm working on this myself. :)
Is it normal that I get angry at my boyfriend so easily?
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If you can, you might benefit from taking a step back when you get angry and reassessing the situation. Most importantly, you must breathe! Take a minute to think it over from every angle (while breathing) - the person who you are angry with, why you are angry with them, and if it is actually worth the energy of your anger. Not every person is out to hurt you! It's also quite important that you surround yourself with people who generally care for your well being. You already know you are naturally defensive in those kinds of situations you mentioned - and that's really excellent, a good start! Now you've just got to retrain yourself to take a minute and really think things through before you say/do something you might regret by lashing out in anger. It's not easy, because it's now a reflex to you....but I think you can overcome this. :)
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DramaticOtter
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Thank u :) Comments like this fill me with hope! haha. I'll try to improve my mood and control my anger... I kinda had given up, but I'll give it another try. Thank you for the feedback, feels good to have such nice internet company!
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Twickers
10 years ago
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Not a problem! You may not succeed at first, but do try, try again! Even in one on one conversation - even if you don't feel you have the time to think your response through - make an effort and call a time out. Say to the person, "we will resume this conversation in five minutes after I step outside for some air". Even if you feel rushed, just remember that those 5 minutes could be the difference between an outrageous response and something a bit more composed (which in the end will lead to a more positive experience). I'm working on this myself. :)