yes this is exactly what i was feeling. That they, say mean things abut me or that they treat me like a sexual object, to take my confidence away so that they would feel better about how they look. I know I have to stay AWAY, I have to RUN! There is no other way to deal with them, because they are not worth my time, they are petty losers with no brains too sometimes.
I have a trauma too! I am that bother with those people because of something that a guy did to me some years ago that I found very traumatic he said something about me in front of others and then he laughed. He was a retard and e has many issued, if i explained you would understand, but I don't want to talk about this person... He is not worthy. haha. After that experience I started being WAY more vulnerable to insults and to losers. Before that I didn't really care.
I can understand your issue very well and I believe you. We have to strengthen our-self and learn to defend our vulnerabilities, especially when we know what is going on. I really hope that you are strong now and that you have got over your trauma, because it isn't worth AT ALL to even think about such losers. You know it and they know it and they had payed about being mean trust me. Everyone pays! We have to be strong and grown up. ;) They are losers not us, except if we don't stop bothering with them...haha
Best of luck girl! <3 You remind me of my friend too really, very much. Some how your words sounded so familiar to me.
Creepy, but I know for a fact my friend is asleep right now lol so its not like we are secretly each other's friends.
One thing I want to tell you is this -- Calling then losers kind of skews my perception up. I sometimes feel the need to insult them too because of how much they hurt me, but its not exactly that they are a loser. No one is a loser forever, people aren't naturally losers. They have no "place," they just put THEMSELVES in that place, that is actually what makes it worse. The word "loser" has the context of someone who can't help but be in a low place. That's not true in the case of these people. These people are weak and don't want to strengthen themselves, instead they prey on others because they have NO idea who they are. They copy people, put people down, or just say everyone's lower so they can feel better.
Even those people, if they are true to themselves, can be cured.
I suggest you not call them losers for this reason or you will misunderstand what their motives are, and you may misunderstand yourself as well. If you call them "losers" than you may be stooping to their level, calling them a loser when they deprived you. You have to rise above that.
I understand that you may not have meant "loser" in the way I expected -- because those people that hurt you are most likely jealous, bad people, and that is something that you are allowed to voice, and if that is what you call a "loser" then by all means, its fine -- but just in case you don't realize what you are saying, it sounds to me like you are speaking to them condescendingly. And I think that isn't healthy or you'll just become the monster they wanted you to be.
But again, I totally feel you. You wrote somewhere that "people bully you because they can't help how intimated they are by you." and that is true, that is what I meant to say as well. I think that if people (on this blog) realized that, they wouldn't be so mean. Again, because of weaker people who can't handle that some people just ARE prettier and some people are not so much, they get very angry when people ADMIT that they are beautiful, because they think its vain. Many times, people only wish they could be so beautiful, so they assume that people who are ACTUALLY beautiful (to most people) are just vain in general, which isn't true. They say "you aren't so pretty, you're just super conceited" because they don't want to admit that you ARE pretty, they want to act like "no you can't be so beautiful, you must be faking it/trying too hard/lying to yourself. They can't admit that there ARE people who are pretty in almost everyone's eyes. (Beauty is for the most part subjective, but there are people out there who are just so pretty they fit almost ANYONE'S taste).
I don't think you should ever have to stop being pretty just so people can be happier with themselves. As I said, I know I'm not that pretty, I really do, but I know that some people still were jealous of me. Its not exactly to do with looks, its often about style/confidence/how you wear yourself. I know I'm like probably just a 5/10 to most people, maybe a 6-7/10 if I am lucky, but I HONESTLY feel like an 11/10, on my bad days maybe a 9/10 MINIMUM. Its all about how you view yourself. I, someone who isn't so beautiful, could have bullied others who were very beautiful, like you or my friend or just anyone else. But I didn't because I have my own beauty. And that is why I dislike those who bully you because they KNOW you look better than them -- they don't take the effort to even know who they are and bring that out, because that creates beauty, too.
I am sure that you actually are, by looks, just a straight 9/10 or 10/10 based on how people react to you (very similar to my very gorgeous friend), but its also because you HAVE confidence that people react this way. What I'm trying to say is, as before, I am not that pretty but because I display myself as quite beautiful, people are ALSO jealous of me.
Even someone (like me) who isn't so beautiful can be beautiful. Everyone can be, but people don't like to do anything, they'd rather be fed it, so they don't see themselves as beautiful even if most people don't.
HAHAHHAHA! I thought about that too! I was going to ask my friend.
Your description of them is EXACTLY what I feel as well, they have NO idea who they are and that is why they pray on others, to destroy their identity as well, make them feel like "nothing". Yes if they become true to who they are....but I don't think that most of them they ever will be. Yes when i said loser I meant jealous and bad,but thank you so much for explaining that, I have to be careful not to be mean to them. Being mean to people like that is a nightmare.... You lose self respect if you act like that to someone that you don't respect their attitude... You have to be kind and yourself or else it means that they effect you. In addition they will be glad they made you mad....
I agree with you on what you said, and I am glad that you have your head in the right place. :)
I really hope that others can read this. We had a long back-and-forth discussion, but it covers a lot of ground. Many people just yelled or just joked about this, but if anyone is serious about it, I'm sure our conversation will be a worthy read.
Oh, that's good to know. I really like to keep my anonymity, so I don't even like to disclose what country I am from. However, I'm sure its kind of obvious that its an English-speaking country.
Is it normal that I feel very uncomfortable about looking good?
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yes this is exactly what i was feeling. That they, say mean things abut me or that they treat me like a sexual object, to take my confidence away so that they would feel better about how they look. I know I have to stay AWAY, I have to RUN! There is no other way to deal with them, because they are not worth my time, they are petty losers with no brains too sometimes.
I have a trauma too! I am that bother with those people because of something that a guy did to me some years ago that I found very traumatic he said something about me in front of others and then he laughed. He was a retard and e has many issued, if i explained you would understand, but I don't want to talk about this person... He is not worthy. haha. After that experience I started being WAY more vulnerable to insults and to losers. Before that I didn't really care.
I can understand your issue very well and I believe you. We have to strengthen our-self and learn to defend our vulnerabilities, especially when we know what is going on. I really hope that you are strong now and that you have got over your trauma, because it isn't worth AT ALL to even think about such losers. You know it and they know it and they had payed about being mean trust me. Everyone pays! We have to be strong and grown up. ;) They are losers not us, except if we don't stop bothering with them...haha
Best of luck girl! <3 You remind me of my friend too really, very much. Some how your words sounded so familiar to me.
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MumHead10
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Creepy, but I know for a fact my friend is asleep right now lol so its not like we are secretly each other's friends.
One thing I want to tell you is this -- Calling then losers kind of skews my perception up. I sometimes feel the need to insult them too because of how much they hurt me, but its not exactly that they are a loser. No one is a loser forever, people aren't naturally losers. They have no "place," they just put THEMSELVES in that place, that is actually what makes it worse. The word "loser" has the context of someone who can't help but be in a low place. That's not true in the case of these people. These people are weak and don't want to strengthen themselves, instead they prey on others because they have NO idea who they are. They copy people, put people down, or just say everyone's lower so they can feel better.
Even those people, if they are true to themselves, can be cured.
I suggest you not call them losers for this reason or you will misunderstand what their motives are, and you may misunderstand yourself as well. If you call them "losers" than you may be stooping to their level, calling them a loser when they deprived you. You have to rise above that.
I understand that you may not have meant "loser" in the way I expected -- because those people that hurt you are most likely jealous, bad people, and that is something that you are allowed to voice, and if that is what you call a "loser" then by all means, its fine -- but just in case you don't realize what you are saying, it sounds to me like you are speaking to them condescendingly. And I think that isn't healthy or you'll just become the monster they wanted you to be.
But again, I totally feel you. You wrote somewhere that "people bully you because they can't help how intimated they are by you." and that is true, that is what I meant to say as well. I think that if people (on this blog) realized that, they wouldn't be so mean. Again, because of weaker people who can't handle that some people just ARE prettier and some people are not so much, they get very angry when people ADMIT that they are beautiful, because they think its vain. Many times, people only wish they could be so beautiful, so they assume that people who are ACTUALLY beautiful (to most people) are just vain in general, which isn't true. They say "you aren't so pretty, you're just super conceited" because they don't want to admit that you ARE pretty, they want to act like "no you can't be so beautiful, you must be faking it/trying too hard/lying to yourself. They can't admit that there ARE people who are pretty in almost everyone's eyes. (Beauty is for the most part subjective, but there are people out there who are just so pretty they fit almost ANYONE'S taste).
I don't think you should ever have to stop being pretty just so people can be happier with themselves. As I said, I know I'm not that pretty, I really do, but I know that some people still were jealous of me. Its not exactly to do with looks, its often about style/confidence/how you wear yourself. I know I'm like probably just a 5/10 to most people, maybe a 6-7/10 if I am lucky, but I HONESTLY feel like an 11/10, on my bad days maybe a 9/10 MINIMUM. Its all about how you view yourself. I, someone who isn't so beautiful, could have bullied others who were very beautiful, like you or my friend or just anyone else. But I didn't because I have my own beauty. And that is why I dislike those who bully you because they KNOW you look better than them -- they don't take the effort to even know who they are and bring that out, because that creates beauty, too.
I am sure that you actually are, by looks, just a straight 9/10 or 10/10 based on how people react to you (very similar to my very gorgeous friend), but its also because you HAVE confidence that people react this way. What I'm trying to say is, as before, I am not that pretty but because I display myself as quite beautiful, people are ALSO jealous of me.
Even someone (like me) who isn't so beautiful can be beautiful. Everyone can be, but people don't like to do anything, they'd rather be fed it, so they don't see themselves as beautiful even if most people don't.
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RedDaisy
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HAHAHHAHA! I thought about that too! I was going to ask my friend.
Your description of them is EXACTLY what I feel as well, they have NO idea who they are and that is why they pray on others, to destroy their identity as well, make them feel like "nothing". Yes if they become true to who they are....but I don't think that most of them they ever will be. Yes when i said loser I meant jealous and bad,but thank you so much for explaining that, I have to be careful not to be mean to them. Being mean to people like that is a nightmare.... You lose self respect if you act like that to someone that you don't respect their attitude... You have to be kind and yourself or else it means that they effect you. In addition they will be glad they made you mad....
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MumHead10
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I agree with you on what you said, and I am glad that you have your head in the right place. :)
I really hope that others can read this. We had a long back-and-forth discussion, but it covers a lot of ground. Many people just yelled or just joked about this, but if anyone is serious about it, I'm sure our conversation will be a worthy read.
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RedDaisy
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Yes we had a very good discussion, it is nice when someone really gets you.😙😙😙
But I think that most people here actually were really nice only a few reacted in a negative. May I ask were are you from ?! 😊
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Oh, that's good to know. I really like to keep my anonymity, so I don't even like to disclose what country I am from. However, I'm sure its kind of obvious that its an English-speaking country.
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RedDaisy
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I am not from an English speaking country. Yes you are right we better keep our anonymity here.