Is it normal that i develop an attraction to guys i really don't like?

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19 Comments

I always find myself falling for guys that I can't stand for one reason or another. Guys that I have a long running disagreement with or guys that I've hated for a while. Me and the guy will dislike each other for a long time, then I'll slowly develop a sexual attraction towards them, then the next I know, I've fallen in love. I've only had two serious relationships (I'm still in one of them) but both of them started like that. And there have been other guys from time to time that I haven't gotten together with but I had the same feelings towards them. This seems to always happen to me. Is it normal for my feelings to change so drastically?

Is It Normal?
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  • Angel_in_a_Glass_Dress
    11 years ago | pl

    sounds like...

    you're either developing an attraction due to a subconscious effort to reverse the hatred

    or your initial hatred could be a reaction against the subconscious attraction

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  • hoping4best
    11 years ago | pl

    I tried to fall 'out' of love with a guy by trying to hate/dislike him. Didnt succeed :/

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  • Bonnabell
    11 years ago | pl

    Sounds like you enjoy the tension. Some people like being challenged they enjoy the whole matter of it all. Some may argue so they can have better sex so maybe you are one of those people.

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  • ariannel
    11 years ago | pl

    This is normal. Conflict can be a turn on if there is underlying attraction. Don't sweat it. So what if you like some spice and passion in your relationship. I bet that love/hate sex is fantastic. Lol!

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  • FireWorks
    11 years ago | pl

    There's a thin line between love and hate.
    I myself don't wanna hate someone, especially a guy, that I might end up being in love with him. Then again, no one can control who they fall in love with.

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  • thischick27
    11 years ago | pl

    Well ithink it's normal u like him but u just wanna act like u dnt soo u just think u hate him .

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  • [Old Memory]
    11 years ago | pl

    This is seriously weird. I mean it sounds like that old saying where if a girl fights with you a lot then she likes you, never really believed that. Try not fighting with someone you like and see if maybe you just like arguing with them.

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    • Bonnabell
      11 years ago | pl

      No people say that since people who are very common tend to fight alot. They may like each other but are too simalar not to fight but are excactly the same.

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  • LightningTechnician
    11 years ago | pl

    Not really.

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  • karmasAbich
    11 years ago | pl

    I think this is normal. Usually opposites attract.

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    • taciturn
      11 years ago | pl

      That's a pretty common misconception, actually. The more accurate aphorism would be "birds of a feather flock together". It may seem like opposites attract, especially if, like the OP, two people are having an argument, but understand that this situation also implies that both of these people are argumentative and passionate about whatever they're arguing. In general it's been found that more similarities lead to higher probabilities of a relationship, and higher probabilities that it'll be healthy.

      Though there is a genius in between the love/hate dialectic.

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